Because we need another Elvira
-
- October
- 18
Full disclosure: This is old news. I was gonna write about it last week, but then our blogs fell extremely ill and blew up and it was all I could do to not blog for two days before we got a temporary site up and running.
But, seriously, this was just too good not to write about at some point.
Thanks to Variety.com, I learned there is a show on the Fox Reality channel (it exists on someone’s cable or dish system, I’m assuming) called The Search for the Next Elvira.
Really. I’m serious. Here’s a picture, as proof:
As much as that photo can be proof of anything, I suppose.
Here’s the guy who I’m rooting for (yes, guy  “Erik-a Beidelman,” of Diamond Bar, Calif.).
Anyhow, Brian Lowry of Variety says the show provides the channel “with an excuse to showcase lots of breasts counting down to Halloween.”
I know a few guys  and, frankly, some gals  who wouldn’t have a problem with that.
But I have a deeper question: Do we need another Elvira? Will the world cave in on itself and cease to exist as it should if there were no one to succeed the Mistress of the Dark? (Did she ever do anything besides squeeze into a tiny black dress with D-sized boobs and introduce horror movies in the middle of the night? Not that there’s anything wrong with that.)
There are just four episodes to narrow down the 13 finalists to the Next Elvira.
The first episode aired first last Saturday night, but airs again at 10 p.m. Friday (tomorrow, Oct. 19). And a whole bunch of other times.
Episode 2 airs at 9 p.m. Saturday (The “Unlucky 13” go on lingerie shopping spree in Hollywood and face an acting challenge inspired by “Elvira’s Haunted Hills.”). Episode 3 airs at 10 p.m. Saturday (The sexy six are subjected to a trio of terrifying tasks. First, they must sell Elvira-branded coffee to tourists. Then, they each go on a dinner date with a reality star. And finally, the six introduce a B-movie a la Elvira’s Movie Macabre.)
But then you have to wait until 5 p.m. on Halloween for the final episode, in which the Top 3 find out who “America voted as the next Elvira.”
Think that’s over the top? Wait until Dec. 7 for “My Bare Lady” (Optimistically dubbed “Season 1”), in which four female U.S. porn stars try to make it as legit actors on the London stage. “They will feel like fish out of water as they swap sex for soliloquies.” (That’s straight from the Fox Reality press release. I couldn’t have made that up if I’d tried.)
Photos courtesy of Fox Reality.ÂÂ
This entry was posted
on Thursday, October 18th, 2007 at 2:37 pm by Amy Vernon.
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