So here we are.

It doesn’t appear this writer’s strike is going anywhere. We’ve lost 8 episodes of Lost (hahahaha, OK, that was lame). The Office is closed for business. Jack Bauer met his match.

And all those folks who’ve ever had any idea for a reality television show are just lovin’ life right now. USAToday has a list of all the reality shows that are on tap, with air dates where available.

It’s no secret that I’m not a huge reality TV or game show buff. But there’s also a big difference between quality and quantity. I don’t watch American Idol, but that doesn’t mean it’s without merit. And I’ve never seen even five minutes of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, but, hey, some nice folks get a brand-new house at the end of the day. Hard to argue there’s something wrong with that.

But Fox’s The Moment of Truth? The contestants are strapped to a lie detector and asked increasingly personal questions. I mean, who on earth volunteers for this show? Anyhow, thanks to USA Today for the following list. Descriptions are mostly directly from USA Today, except where noted:

ABC

• Duel (week-long event, Dec. 17-23, 8 p.m.). Quiz show in which contestants win by bluffing. (Me: What?)
• Dance Wars: Bruno vs. Carrie Ann (Jan. 7, Mondays at 8 p.m.). Dancing With the Stars’ choreographers field their own teams in this live dance-off, which bridges the gap before DWTS returns in March. Drew Lachey (pictured, at right) hosts. (Me: Oh, good. We needed the winner of a reality show [DWTS] and sibling of a reality star [Nick was married to Jessica Simpson and they had their infamous MTV show in which she proved to the world she was an idiot.] to host yet another reality show.)
• Oprah’s Big Give. Winfrey bestows cash on needy families.
• Here Come the Newlyweds. A six-episode comedic game pitting couples in marital tests. (Me: You just know there are a few couples who will end up in the sequel, There Go the Divorcees.)
• Wanna Bet? Celebrities wager (for charity) on whether contestants can perform outrageous stunts. (Me: Ain’t that cute? Regular folks get to humiliate themselves for celebrities’ charities? Awww.)
• Also: New seasons of Wife Swap and Supernanny, expanded episodes of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition and possibly more America’s Funniest Videos. (Me: I have got to admit, I’ve seen partial episodes of Wife Swap, much in the way one slows down at the sight of a fiery crash on the highway.)

CBS

• Big Brother. A first-time spring season of the summer staple will likely begin in February or March. (Me: A sign of the apocalypse.)
• Million-Dollar Password. A high-stakes version of the game-show classic, hosted by Regis Philbin. (Me: Hey, last time Regis hosted a primetime game show, he started a fashion trend with the monochrome tie/shirt combo. What will he have in store for us this time?)
• Do You Trust Me? Tucker Carlson hosts a quiz show in which strangers bet on their mutual confidence in each other. (Me: Tucker Carlson, really?)
• Also: Additional cycles of Survivor and The Amazing Race, and a new season of the Drew Carey game show Power of 10. (Me: I’ve never seen any of these so I don’t really have anything clever to say here.)

Fox

• The Moment of Truth (Jan. 23, Wednesdays at 9 p.m.). Game show in which contestants are strapped to a lie detector and asked highly personal questions. (Me: Police are on hand to arrest those who assault the questioner. Oh, and by the by, James Hibberd over at TVWeek.com reported that Fox has increased its order for the show from seven to 12 episodes. Sigh.)
• When Women Rule the World (Mar. 3, Mondays at 8 p.m.). Alpha women control “a group of unsuspecting men used to calling the shots.” (Me: One question — what show do these “unsuspectnig” men think they’re competing on?)
• Also: American Idol (Jan. 15), Hell’s Kitchen (Apr. 1), Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader?, Don’t Forget the Lyrics, Cops and America’s Most Wanted. (Me: I’m looking forward to Idol’s return, not because I watch, but because I enjoyed Chris Serico’s weekly roundups last year.)

NBC

• Celebrity Apprentice. Stars compete for Donald Trump’s approval as hot-dog vendors and in other unlikely occupations. (Me: I still wish Rosie were one of the competitors. That would have been fun.)
• American Gladiators. The 1990s series is revived, with stuntmen competing against amateurs in physical competitions. Hulk Hogan, Laila Ali host. (Me: Woo-hoo!)
• Amnesia. Dennis Miller hosts this quiz show that asks contestants to recall key moments of their lives. (Me: How, exactly, will Miller know if they’re wrong?)
• My Dad Is Better Than Your Dad. Families compete in stunt challenges. (Me: Oh, yeah, there won’t be any fist fights on this show.)
• Clash of the Choirs. Celebrities establish amateur singing groups, which compete live in yet another Idol variation. (Me: Um, what?)
• Also: New season of 1 vs. 100, and Deal or No Deal continues. (Me: Used to love Deal, but it got old really fast. Side note: Two of the show’s suitcase holders/models dressed up in fat suits and latex makeup recently and walked the streets of Manhattan. They were aghast at how differently they were treated. Brooke, who usually holds Suitcase 15 (pictured, at right), said she couldn’t wait to “return to her regular physical self.” Leyla, Suitcase 13 (pictured, at left), told Entertainment Tonight [which did this “investigation”], “It really affected us. I knew we were going to get looks, but I mean, the comments and the stares and just the way people avoided us.” No, I am not kidding.)

The CW

• Crowned: The Mother of All Pageants (Dec. 12, Wednesdays at 8 p.m.). Mother-daughter teams compete for a beauty pageant title while shacking up in bunk beds in a Hollywood mansion. (Me: OK, no fistfights here, but just catfights and hair pulling. No good can possibly come of this. I foresee tears and bulimia.)
• Farmer Wants a Wife. A dating series in which a yokel selects a city beauty. (Me: C’mon, what on earth could I say to top that?)
• Also: New seasons of Pussycat Dolls, Beauty and the Geek and America’s Next Top Model. (Me: I hate to admit it, but a part of me has always wanted to watch Beauty and the Geek. Maybe I will.

Photo (of Truth host Mark L. Walberg) courtesy of Fox. Deal or No Deal photos courtesy of NBC Universal. Drew Lachey photo courtesy of ABC.