A very Darling Christmas
-
- December
- 6
Ah, Christmas.
It’s the time of year when fathers prostitute their daughters, ministers leave the church and transgender mistresses go missing.
What? That doesn’t happen at your house for the holidays?
Well, we are dealing with the Darlings on “Dirty Sexy Money,” after all.
Last night’s episode was a whirlwind of Darling offspring, from Karen and Tripp’s alliance against Simon to Brian’s crisis of faith.
Let’s break it down Darling by Darling, shall we?
Patrick: The eldest Darling kid isn’t all there in the smarts department, is he? His wife shoots him in the leg over his affair with Carmelita and he’s still lying to her. But the mistress problem may now be solved, since Carmelita’s gone missing. Anyone else suspect Patrick? Or could it be Ellen? (Though I’m having a hard time envisioning Ellen taking down Carmelita; that Amazon would eat Ellen’s lunch. Then again, Ellen may have Crazy Strength.)
Brian: The now half-sibling had a crisis of faith, after being suspended from his church post. (You know those church folk, they frown on little things like illegitimate children and felony arrests.) I loved his scene with Letitia: Did you notice her washing his feet, an obvious reference to Jesus and the apostles? Great writing here, too. Brian’s explaination that he doesn’t have the same kind of faith as other ministers? “Sure, I get weepy at Christmas and the Crucifixion kind of gets to me…” Now he’s going to work for Darling Enterprises? Can’t wait to see what his new job turns out to be.
Karen: Holy smokes, who’d have thought drunken, marriage-addicted Karen would have the brains to pull off a double-cross of Simon? No telling when she and Tripp cooked up the plan to have Karen whore herself out to learn some of Simon’s secrets. And what was it exactly about Karen’s dinner with Simon’s ex-wife (a literal princess) that got her so upset? The father-daughter scheme may be on the fritz, though: If Karen’s emotional involvement doesn’t wreck it, Nick’s insistence that Simon give up Karen may do the trick. P.S. Did you recognize New Rochelle’s Gina Torres (”Alias,” “24,” “The Matrix Revolutions”) as Simon’s ex?
Jeremy: Well, his pretense of being a poor artist had some unexpected fall-out for Nick’s wife, Lisa. He convinces Lisa to get high in the art gallery—”We need to chillax!”—and the smoke ruins a sculpture and Lisa gets fired. But not before Jeremy plants a big ol’ smooch on Lisa. One that she looked like she sorta liked. Oh yeah, and he tells Sofia the truth about being a Darling, and she dumps him anyway.
Juliet: My favorite little Paris clone was back this week—yay! Actress Samaire Armstrong was in rehab for a bit, so the show explained Juliet’s absence by having Karen give Juliet her honeymoon in the Seychelles. (Right, like these people are worried about a non-refundable plane ticket.) Anyway, after giving Karen a hilarious, convoluted explanation of how to improve her life, she skipped downstairs to meet her new Seychelles boyfriend who’s come for a two-week visit. By the show’s end, Island Boy decides to stay in the lap of luxury instead of returning home. Hopefully, Juliet isn’t giving her virginity to a con artist.
I wish I had more to report on the next “DSM” installment, but there’s no word yet on when that will air. The show reportedly has three more episodes in the can before going on strike-induced hiatus.
My guess is that ABC will wait until after the new year to bring us some more dirty, sexy fun.
(Photos courtesy of ABC)Â
This entry was posted
on Thursday, December 6th, 2007 at 3:06 pm by Heather Salerno.
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