Little J. staged some guerrilla fashion warfare on high society last night, and although her little stunt got her onto Page Six and some possible financial backing for her clothing line, it cost her Vanessa’s friendship and her dad’s approval.

Yes, little Jenny Humphrey hijacked a charity ball honoring Lily and Bart and turned it into the stage for a Betsy Johnson-on-steroids-style fashion show starring new pal Agnes and her model friends.

I guess spending all that time with Blair paid off because girlfriend knows how to multi-task: In the midst of all this scheming and plotting, she had time to seriously smooch Nate Archibald and score a major Gossip Girl posting.

Which gets Jenny into major trouble with Vanessa, who clearly still has feelings for the Upper East Side’s favorite gigolo. Come on, girls: Why fight over Nate? He probably won’t remember your name in a few weeks, as evidenced by his forgettable hook-up with Jordan, the Yale T.A. trying to help Dan with his writing application.

As for Rufus, his bright idea on how to handle his defiant daughter? Try to get her arrested. Luckily, Lily refuses to press charges and gently tells Rufus that Jenny’s show was inspired and that she’s a true artist. (Who’d have thunk that absentee mom Lily would have the better parenting advice?)

Meanwhile, Blair, Chuck and Serena spent most of the evening racing around to Manhattan hotspots in the search of Emma, the practically pre-teen daughter of a prominent Yale donor. See, Serena tried to boost Blair’s chances of getting into her dream school (because, you know, Princeton is a trade school) by offering B. as a babysitter.

Except, oops, little Emma is hell-bent on busting out of Virgintown and wants to be deflowered by anyone who’ll take her.

Serena comes up with the plan of distracting her with the charity ball, but not before she undergoes a much-needed makeover. (Which hopefully involved burning Emma’s tie-died muumuu and sending it to a discount clearance rack in the sky…)

All was well, until Emma ran into the Devirginator: Chuck Bass. And surprise, surprise, Chuck actually grew a conscience: He refuses to take Emma’s challenge, implying that limousine backseats should be reserved for special occasions (like s-e-x with Blair, aww! Sweet!).

The rest of the episode was spent searching through crowded bars for runaway Emma, who clearly did her NYC research. So did her mom, because the gang also spotted her at 1Oak in a clinch with a hot guy who’s not her husband.

Click goes the camera phone, and Blair is plunged into blackmail bliss. She still helps save Emma from the clutches of random Serge, however: And um, does Chuck’s “lose the tulip” line mean what I think it does?

Blair ends up taking the high road, choosing to tell off Emma’s mom about her crappy mothering instead of flashing the blackmail photo. Emma saves the day for Blair, too, telling the Yale dean that the Queen B. is the person—dead or alive—who she’d most like to have dinner with. (Jeez, the dean really needs to get a new admissions benchmark.)

And Serena? Besides continuing to wear inappropriately short dresses to college interviews, she didn’t do much besides coo over old camp photos of her and Aaron. And worry about whether he just wants to add her to his harem of girls.

But how could he be anything other than a sweetie pie when he saved their licorice wedding ring from all those years ago, right? Ick. Who cares? Anyone else not feeling Aaron Rose? Seems like kind of a snore to me. Those sweaters he uses as scarves are really bothering me, too.

So how did it all end?

Dan was inspired by Jenny’s underhanded tactics and decided to write his Chuck Bass-Charlie Trout story for nasty old ex-mentor, Noah Shapiro.

Jenny’s now homeless and apparently taking style cues from the Olsen twins, aimlessly walking the streets of Brooklyn and looking stylishly disheveled. (BTW, Dan, you’d think you’d mention that your little sis packed her suitcases before discussing your writing future with Dad. Way to make it all about you.)

Nate is at a mailbox, sending a letter (of apology?) to Jenny. Has his financial situation forced him to give up his cell phone? He couldn’t just text?

And all of that was set to an awesome song I haven’t heard in ages: “No New Tale to Tell” by Love and Rockets. Perfect, perfect choice, and one that redeemed the show’s musical taste after setting Jenny’s fashion show to a horrendous cover of the Ramones’ “Sheena is a Punk Rocker.”

That’s it for now, boys and girls. Until next week, when Wallace Shawn (“The Princess Bride”) pops up as Cyrus Rose, Aaron’s dad and Eleanor Waldorf’s new man!

Inconceivable!

(Photos courtesy of the CW)