We’ve now got our Top 20 dancers – whoo hoo! – so we can start rooting for our favorites.

Unfortunately, I don’t know who my favorites are yet, do you?

Seriously, I couldn’t pick half of the finalists out of a lineup right now.

Kayla? Ashley? Jonathan? Totally clueless.

Melissa only stands out for me because she seems oddly obsessed with wearing a tutu.

Vitolio? I don’t remember him at all from the auditions. (Although NOW I know who he is, thanks to last night’s disgusting “diarrhea moment” comment.)

There are one or two who rub me the wrong way at the moment – and I’ll admit that it’s for completely random and unfair reasons. For example, I’ve despised Asuka from the moment she stepped onstage, even going back to her auditions in past seasons, simply because she has a tendency to wink a lot. I don’t like winkers.

So who are the standouts for me at the moment? My love is growing for fellow New Yorker Tony Bellissimo, who knows he’s not the most talented contestant – but he’s a fighter. It seems like he’s gonna bust his butt trying to win this competition.

I like Kupono for having the guts to shave his head, after the judges commented about his quirky, feminine look. Plus, I kept comparing him to last season’s Mark – so this helps distinguish him.

As for the girls, Paris catches my eye for a reason I can’t quite put my finger on.

Otherwise, the field is wide open for me! Want to know a bit more about the Top 20 to make your own preliminary selections?

Click through to read a short bio on each of them, which includes their hometowns and dance experience.

But before I do that, I’ve got to comment on the Alex Wong situation. That guy was a complete lock – for both the fans and the judges – for the Top 20. And he TOTALLY deserved it, too.

So why, why, WHY did the producers let him get so far when they knew FULL WELL that he was under contract with the Miami Ballet Co.?

Because it’s good TV, that’s why. (Of course.) Still, keeping him on was incredibly unfair to Alex, who seemed to sincerely think he had a shot.

Even more, it was unfair to the viewing audience, who had no clue about Alex’s potential conflict and some of whom had already started rooting for him. A cheap move to bump up the episode’s drama, when it wasn’t really needed. For shame, Nigel. For shame.

Anyway, let’s find out some more about our current Top 20, shall we? Let’s start with the girls…

Girls

Randi Evans

Dance Specialty: Jazz

Hometown: Orem, UT

Currently Resides: Springville, UT

Age: 23

Evans began dancing at an early age and performed in the closing ceremonies at the 2002 Salt Lake City Winter Olympic Games. She currently attends Utah Valley University where she is majoring in elementary education.

Karla Garcia

Dance Specialty: Jazz/Contemporary

Hometown: Oxon Hill, MD

Currently Resides: Brooklyn, NY

Age: 23

Garcia is a graduate of New York University. Her early dance experience included learning traditional Filipino folk dancing. Garcia performed on Broadway in “Hot Feet,” danced in the ensemble of the “Radio City Christmas Spectacular” and went on to tour with “Wicked.”

Caitlin Kinney

Dance Specialty: Contemporary

Hometown: Annapolis, MD

Currently Resides: Annapolis, MD

Age: 21

Kinney graduated from the Baltimore School for the Arts in 2005. She danced at North Carolina Dance Theatre as an apprentice for two years and is an experienced gymnast.

Asuka Kondoh

Dance Specialty: Latin Ballroom

Hometown: San Francisco, CA

Currently Resides: Irvine, CA

Age: 25

Kondoh loves swimming, golf and tennis and has played piano for 13 years. She is a graduate of University of California, Irvine, and has worked as a Latin Ballroom instructor for the last two years.

Janette Manrara

Dance Specialty: Salsa

Hometown: Miami, FL

Currently Resides: Hialeah, FL

Age: 25

Manrara began performing in musical theater at age 12, and started her formal dance training at 19, studying Ballroom, Ballet, Pointe, Jazz and Hip Hop. She currently attends Florida State University.

Jeanine Mason

Dance Specialty: Contemporary

Hometown: Miami, FL

Currently Resides: Pinecrest, FL

Age: 18

A recent graduate of the Ransom Everglades School, Mason plans to attend the University of California, Los Angeles in the fall. She began her dance training in Ballet and Lyrical and then went on to study Jazz, Acrobatics, Hip Hop, Modern and Contemporary.

Kayla Radomski

Dance Specialty: Jazz/Contemporary

Hometown: Aurora, CO

Currently Resides: Aurora, CO

Age: 18

Radomski has been dancing for most of her life, and participating in SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE is one of her most rewarding experiences. She is grateful to her amazing mother who has supported her love of dance for so many years. Radomski also enjoys acting and singing.

Melissa Sandvig

Dance Specialty: Ballet

Hometown: Los Alamitos, CA

Currently Resides: Los Alamitos, CA

Age: 29

Sandvig has been dancing for most of her life. She has danced with the Milwaukee Ballet Company, LA Opera, Long Beach Ballet and Helios Dance Theater. A highlight for Sandvig was performing “Le Coeur Illumine” at the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion.

Paris Torres

Dance Specialty: Contemporary

Hometown: Issaquah, WA

Currently Resides: Issaquah, WA

Age: 19

Torres is a graduate of Skyline High School. She began dancing when she was 6 years old and now teaches at a studio near her home. She was also a Miss Washington Teen pageant winner, and was a Seattle Storm and Seattle Sonic Jr. dancer from 2000-2003.

Ashley Valerio

Dance Specialty: Contemporary

Hometown: Mesa, AZ

Currently Resides: North Hollywood, CA

Age: 22

Valerio has been dancing for most of her life. She is a graduate of Mountain View High School.

Guys

Kupono Aweau

Dance Specialty: Lyrical/Contemporary

Hometown: Honolulu, HI

Currently Resides: Kailua, HI

Age: 23

Aweau graduated from the Kamehameha Schools and has been dancing since he was 16 years old. He loves his home state of Hawaii, and is an avid collector of home furnishings.

Tony Bellissimo

Dance Specialty: Hip Hop

Hometown: Buffalo, NY

Currently Resides: Buffalo, NY

Age: 20

Bellissimo has been dancing for most of his life. He is a graduate of Frontier High School, and played on the school’s soccer, football and lacrosse teams. He likes to write short stories and poems, and his favorite professional dancer is Barry Lather.

Brandon Bryant

Dance Specialty: Contemporary

Hometown: Miami, FL

Currently Resides: Salt Lake City, UT

Age: 19

Bryant began dancing ballet at age 10. He is a graduate of Coral Reef Senior High School and now attends Miami Dade College. His most memorable dance experience was performing for Madonna at her daughter’s birthday party.

Phillip Chbeeb

Dance Specialty: Popping

Hometown: Houston, TX

Currently Resides: Los Angeles, CA

Age: 20

Chbeeb has had no formal dance training, but began dancing when he was 15 years old. At age 16, he founded the Marvelous Motion Studio in Houston. He is currently an engineering physics major at Loyola Marymount University.

Jason Glover

Dance Specialty: Lyrical/Contemporary

Hometown: Fresno, CA

Currently Resides: Fresno, CA

Age: 21

Glover began dancing at age 12, studying Tap and Hip Hop. He is a graduate of Bullard High School, and his favorite dancer is Michael Jackson.

Vitolio Jeune

Dance Specialty: Contemporary

Hometown: Pétionville, Haiti

Currently Resides: Miami, FL

Age: 26

Jeune began dancing at age 18, and is a graduate of Florida’s New World School of the Arts. He loves motorcycles, and his favorite dancer is Desmond Richardson.

Max Kapitannikov

Dance Specialty: Latin Ballroom

Hometown: Moscow, Russia

Currently Resides: Brooklyn, NY

Age: 26

Kapitannikov has been dancing for as long as he can remember. He comes from a dancing family, and his mother is a ballet teacher. He also enjoys sculpting and playing the guitar. He attended the Manhattan Comprehensive High School.

Evan Kasprzak

Dance Specialty: Broadway

Hometown: West Bloomfield, MI

Currently Resides: West Bloomfield, MI

Age: 21

Kasprzak graduated from Wylie E. Groves High School and currently attends Illinois Wesleyan University. He has been dancing since he was 6 years old, and his most memorable dance experience was performing in a Gregory Hines tribute with Hines’ family in the audience.

Ade Obayomi

Dance Specialty: Contemporary

Hometown: Chandler, AZ

Currently Resides: Orange County, CA

Age: 20

Obayomi has been dancing since he was 6 years old. He is a graduate of Corona Del Sol High School and currently attends Chapman University. A dance highlight for him was performing at Radio City Music Hall.

Jonathan Platero

Dance Specialty: Salsa

Hometown: Sanford, FL

Currently Resides: New York, NY

Age: 21

Platero was a gymnast before he began dancing at age 16. He is a graduate of Seminole High School, was a World Salsa finalist in 2006-2007 and performed as a dancer and acrobat in “High School Musical.”

(Photos and biographical information courtesy of FOX)

And when I say “slash,” I almost mean it literally. Did this season’s Vegas Week seem unusually brutal to you?

In particular, Mia Michaels seemed crankier than usual: She was practically salivating as she threatened dancers with her new catchphrase, “I’m a cutter.” By the end of her contemporary boot camp, I was half-expecting her to shank somebody right up there on the stage.

So, yes, the judges were harsh, especially on those dancers who they’d built up based on their city-by-city auditions.

But how to explain their super-quick rejection of poor Natalie Reid (who deserved a better explanation than being merely “disappointing”), yet giving second and even third chances to folks like Gabi Rojas (who couldn’t even master basic steps in several choreography rounds) or Tony Bellissimo (who was allowed a do-over of Mia’s routine instead of dancing for his life)?

Sure, a sobbing Tony made it through to the semi-finals after working his well-shaped butt off. But then there were seemingly less talented others, like popper Phillip Chbeeb, who’s among the last 36 dancers despite Adam’s giggles that he couldn’t stop popping throughout the ballroom routine.

And I might get slammed for this, but try as I might, I just can’t get on board the love train for the Kasprzak brothers. Based on the trailers shown for tonight’s Top 20 reveal, it seems that the judges will likely only choose one of them to move on.

But from what I’ve seen so far, the contest wouldn’t benefit much from either “flea hopping” Evan or Nerdology’s Ryan. (Although I have to admit that Nerdology’s number was pretty fun: It actually told a story, unlike the rest of the mostly horrific group routines, and seemed even reminscient of some of Tabitha and Napolean’s past dances.)

However, best of luck to you, boys, and if you make it through, I’m happy to be proven wrong.

And speaking of siblings, let’s talk about the Kinney sisters. I suspect that the judges’ ultimate choice to keep Caitlin and dump Megan had a lot more to do with being, shall we say, camera-friendly?, than actual dance ability.

After all, Megan flew to safety round after round, while Caitlin was asked to dance for her life and then BARELY mustered enough of the judges’ votes to stay put. Yet, fast-forward to the end, it was Megan who got canned.

Sure, the judges SAY they see “potential” in Caitlin, but perhaps they also saw a sinewy blonde with a great backstory (she’s only been dancing for a few years, and has come back from hip replacement surgery).

Meanwhile, Megan is more talented, but comes across as a slack-jawed potato face. Sorry, Girlfriend, I was pulling for you, but even I couldn’t watch another second of you vacantly watching your sister perform with your mouth hanging open. All I could think was: Shut. Your. Trap.

Anyway, the Top 20 will be announced tonight: Is there anyone YOU think is a lock?

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

Well, I guess August wasn’t exactly yesterday. But it seems way too soon to be hearing about upcoming auditions for next summer’s season!

Either way, the show kicks off its latest search on Thursday, Nov. 13 in New York City—WHEE!

I’m particularly excited because “Dance” ignored NYC during the last go-round, preferring to focus on cities like Salt Lake City and Milwaukee. And while I’ve got nothing but love for middle staters, let’s be honest: Those auditions didn’t exactly yield super-talent.

(Here’s where all you Gev and Thayne lovers point out that two of last season’s Top 10 boys hailed from Utah. To which I say: Yeah, yeah, yeah…)

Anyway, here’s the deets on the Big Apple date:

WHEN: Registration begins at 8:00 AM on Thursday, Nov. 13

WHERE: Mark Morris Dance Center,  3 Lafayette Ave,  Brooklyn, NY. http://markmorrisdancegroup.org/the_dance_center

Additional dates and venues for Denver, Los Angeles, Memphis, Miami and Seattle will be announced shortly.

Keep watching www.fox.com/dance for more info.

(Photo courtesy of FOX)

As Remote Access readers know, if I’m going to watch a dance show, I’ll watch my summertime favorite, “So You Think You Can Dance,” where, you know, actual DANCERS compete.

But I may have to break my DWTS rule, and start watching the upcoming season, which kicks off Sept. 22.

Why? Well, ABC just announced its lineup of contestants—keep reading to see the complete list—which includes such personalities as reality diva Kim Kardashian, Olympian Misty May-Traynor and singer Toni Braxton.

I’m not so interested in the main contestants, but I am looking forward to seeing one particular professional dance partner who’s joined the show.

Lacey Schwimmer—a finalist on SYTYCD’s Season 3 and the sister of the show’s Season 2 winner, Benji Schwimmer—will make her series debut teamed up with former ‘N SYNCer Lance Bass.

Of course, there’s no mention of Lacey’s connection to that OTHER dance show in her ABC bio. She’s simply referred to as the 2006 U.S. Youth Latin Champ and 2007 World Swing Dance Champ.

But I’m guessing more than a few SYTYCD fans will be tuning in to see how our Season 3 sexpot does in this contest.

You want more? Okay, okay!

Click through to read the full run-down of the 13 pseudo-celebrities who’ll be waltzing across your screen next month—and their partners:

• Singer Lance Bass and Lacey Schwimmer

• Singer Toni Braxton and Season 1 champ Alex Mazo

• Actress Brooke Burke and Derek Hough

• Celebrity chef Rocco DiSpirito and Karina Smirnoff

• Track phenom Maurice Green and two-time champ Cheryl Burke

• Reality TV star Kim Kardashian and defending champ Mark Ballas

• Academy Award winner Cloris Leachman and World Latin Champion Corky Ballas (Mark’s dad)

• Actor Cody Linley of “Hannah Montana” and two-time champ Julianne Hough

• “All My Children” star Susan Lucci and Tony Dovolani

• Beach volleyball Olympian Misty May-Treanor and Maksim Chmerkovskiy

• Actor Ted McGinley and Inna Brayer

• Comedian Jeffrey Ross and Edyta Sliwinska

• Football star Warren Sapp and Kym Johnson

(Photos courtesy of ABC, FOX and the Associated Press) 

For the first time, America chose a street dancer as their favorite—and the Texas boy with the strength of a stallion couldn’t have been more humble about it.

“Don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t do something,” he said tearfully after winning the title, $250,000 and a featured role in guest judge Adam Shankman’s next film, “Step Up 3D.”

WHEE!

Was Joshua the best technical dancer in the Top 10?

Nope, those honors went to Will and Katee (who I was surprised to see come in third, but she got a Top Girl consolation prize of $50,000).

But as many of the judges kept saying, Joshua showed the most heart—and that’s what inspired America to vote.

Really, even if he wasn’t your first choice, how could you not be happy for the guy? Talent aside, he appears to be a genuine sweetheart—someone you could really root for.

Speaking of genuine, how about that runner-up Twitch? What a gentleman!

He seemed honestly happy for his pal, even hoisting Josh’s arm with a victory whoop. (Before being unceremoniously shoved offstage, that is.)

And poor Courtney. Even she knew she didn’t have a chance in hell of winning—yet she was still quite gracious about placing fourth.

That said, the rest of the finale was a big improvement over last year: The obligatory musical group (the Jonas Brothers) aside, the guests were all focused on dance.

From the season’s most memorable numbers to Cirque du Soleil’s weirdly wonderful “Homage to the Rabbits” to the Top 20 performance with a bunch of our favorite SYTYCD old-timers (Neil, Travis, Lauren, yay!), the show was truly a lot of fun without feeling forced.

And I’ll admit it, I even kind of got into the numbers by judges Mary Murphy (a Latin hip-shaker with Season 2’s Dmitry) and Nigel Lythgoe (tapping away with the Debbie Allen Dance Academy). You’ve got to hand it to them for being brave: They put their money where their (often hyper-critical) mouth is.

One minor quibble, however. Anyone else think that Will got a bit too much air time considering he wasn’t in the Top 4?

I’m the first to admit that the boy was totally robbed when he was kicked off after being slated to win the whole she-bang, but hey, that’s the way America voted.

Yet he got a momentary spotlight solo during the intro, where the rest of the Top 20 danced with others, and Cat allowed him to jabber on about his wonderful experience on the show while dismissing the rest of the performers. Anyone else think the show was trying to tell us something?

So that’s it until next summer, folks! Unless you’re planning to check out the dancers on tour.

Here you go, FOX, I’ll give you a free plug: Go to www.fox.com/dance to find a show near you.

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

Especially Twitch and Joshua, because if you believe the rumor mill, the boys were the two dancers rushed to the hospital over the weekend for dehydration.

The only references the show made to the incident were vague, like Nigel’s comment after the quartet’s last Braveheart-inspired Mia Michaels routine. He told the group that he knows everyone’s exhausted, but tough noogies, no one in an audience cares about that when they’re watching a show.

Whatever. If Twitch and Joshua were indeed the ones who collapsed, I’d say they deserve a little sympathy after watching their insanely taxing Russian typytych, which was without question the best routine of the night.

A dance battle played out to the Nutcracker Suite?!? Total genius. And like guest judge Mandy Moore pointed out, those dudes needed the stamina of stallions to pull that off.

That said, the number also served to highlight every single one of Joshua’s strengths. Those leaps! Those flips! That now brace-free smile!

If this dance battle was supposed to parallel the larger competition, I’d say Josh—not Twitch—will be the winner tonight. The judges seemed to be steering voters that way, too, with Nigel calling Joshua and Katee “two of the most brilliant dancers ever on this show.”

So why don’t I think Katee will win?

Don’t get me wrong, she’s got a shot—and if she’s crowned America’s Favorite Dancer, I wouldn’t be surprised. Her technique is spectacular, and she’s never gotten a bad review from the judges.

But I suspect that Katee may fall prey to the same syndrome that afflicted Chelsie Hightower last week: She’s just too consistently good, so the fact that she’s made it this far hasn’t surprised anyone.

It’ll be a close call, but I’ll wager that the audience, much like Nigel & Co., are loving Joshua’s “untrained” status just a tiny bit more. That gives him a strange but powerful advantage: He can be an underdog at the same time he’s a fan favorite.

Plus, who wouldn’t love that a hip-hopper would take the title for the first time?

Twitch is awesome and everything, but I doubt the “humor” that the judges keep stressing will be enough to see him through.

As for Courtney, she’s been the dark horse of this competition, but I’m pretty sure the race ends here for her. The judges seemed to be giving her the consolation prize of being an “inspiration” to lots of little girls for chugging along and making it to the finale.

I mean, there seemed to be an unspoken rule last night that the judges would pull back any major criticism of the dancers, letting America make up its own mind in the end. They obeyed that with everyone except Courtney.

After her solo—which, granted, wasn’t her best—Mandy encouraged her to “train more.”

Following that train wreck of a Broadway routine with Katee (Tyce Diorio, what were you thinking?!?), Nigel compared the two girls, saying that Katee had “that extra little bit that makes me go, ‘Wow.’”

Jeez, could you give voters any more of a “wink, wink, nudge, nudge,” Nigel?

But we’ll see if America took the hint tonight, when the winner is finally announced.

And don’t just tune in for the last five minutes. The two-hour show is packed with entertaining stuff:

• The rest of the Top 20 will be back performing the best routines of the season (please, sir, can we have some more of Sonya’s French burlesque from Courtney and Mark?)

• The Jonas Brothers will perform! (Insert squeals of glee here from teen-age girls everywhere!)

• The cast of magician Criss Angel’s new Vegas show with Cirque du Soleil—choreographed by “Dance” favorite Wade Robson—will do a number.

So tune in here tomorrow to discuss the show—and whether America chose the right dancer.

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

Judge Mary Murphy told People magazine that the two unnamed dancers collapsed during rehearsals on Saturday, and they were rushed by ambulance to nearby Cedars Sinai Hospital.

Murphy said that the other two (presumably healthy) dancers weren’t allowed to practice on Sunday, so the playing field would hopefully be level for tonight’s final performance show.

But will it?

FOX refused to give the identities of the ill dancers, so it’ll be interesting to see if the show acknowledges the situation tonight.

Previously, we’d been told about Comfort’s dislocated shoulder—but that was way back in the first week of the competition. The stakes are much higher now.

My guess is that lips will be sealed this time, because the producers won’t want to be accused of messing with the winning results: Viewers might give the sick dancers sympathy votes.

We’ll see what happens when the big event kicks off tonight at 8—and the winner is crowned on Thursday. Stay tuned!

(Photo courtesy of FOX)

The show will shake its money maker again next summer, which is no real surprise since “Dance” ranks among the Top 5 with adults 18 to 49.

In fact, the reality series has become such a big deal, head “jidge” Nigel Lythgoe announced he’s stepping down as executive producer of his other hit: a little something called “American Idol.”

He’ll be devoting his time to nurturing versions of “Dance” in other countries, as well as to a new venture with fellow co- creator, Simon Fuller.

For now, however, he’s counting down to tomorrow’s two-hour performance finale. It’s the dance battle to end all dance battles, with Twitch Boss, Katee Shean, Courtney Galiano and Joshua Allen (pictured above) fighting for the title of America’s Favorite Dancer.

The winner will be announced Thursday night.

Go Twitch, go Twitch, go Katee, go Katee, go Courtney, go Courtney, go Joshua, go Joshua, go, go, go…

(So sue me, I haven’t picked a favorite yet.)

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

As you probably know by now—and if you don’t, stop reading now!—Katee, Joshua, Courtney and Twitch are all headed for next week’s showdown to win the “favorite dancer” title.

Chelsie and Mark—sniffle—are headed home. (And for the national tour, of course! Go to www.fox.com/dance to buy tickets this weekend for a show at a town near you.)

Were the results a surprise? Well, yes and no. This contest has been so topsy-turvy in the last few weeks that any of the Top 6 could have moved on.

But wisely, Katee and Joshua were whisked right to safety—and even though Cat emphasized that didn’t necessarily mean they got the most votes, we all know she’s lying. These partners are by far the most popular dancers right now, and they’re very likely to be the ones battling it out at the very end of the finale.

Yet, could dark horse Courtney be a threat? I don’t think even she believed she would make it this far, since she’d been in danger a few times. She improved by leaps and bounds as the competition progressed, however, and the fans noticed and rallied big time.

How else could she have bested the teachers’ pet, Chelsie, who could do no wrong?

Seriously, when you think about it, how did Courtney beat out Chelsie, who, along with Katee, rarely received a negative comment from the judges? Now that I’m thinking about it, had Chelsie ever had to dance for her life?

Well, my guess is that Chelsie simply didn’t grow as much as Courtney did. Weird as it may sound, Chelsie being great ALL THE TIME may have been her undoing. Then again, Katee has been consistently great, too, and that certainly didn’t hurt her any. So what do I know? Maybe Katee’s hometown of San Jose was just majorly blasting the phone lines.

As for Mark and Twitch? Charisma seemed to trump quirky in this case, with a gracious Mark seeming genuinely happy for Twitch’s victory.

Nigel said that each one of the finalists polled over a million votes, but if I had to make a wager, it would be that Twitch and Mark were THISCLOSE.

And not to jump on the Mark bandwagon at this late date, but I was really charmed by his farewell speech. He hinted that he’d always felt out of place and unusual, so he was grateful that the audience liked his odd moves and kept him in the competition this long. Hooray, nonconformity!

Anyway, other than a few random tidbits—Joshua got his braces off! Six-year-old Lil’ Demon can break like the big boys!—that’s all the news from the dance floor. Because I’m not even going to get into the Lady Gaga performance, except to say, “What the hell was that?!?”

So tune in to the very last performance show next Wednesday, and find out Thursday who’ll be crowned the champion and walk away with the $250,000 prize—and a role in guest judge Adam Shankman’s new movie!

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

But now, between last week’s shocking elimination of the amazing Will Wingfield and last night’s incredible performances, I’m surprised to say that anything could happen in this competition.

Right now, I can’t even begin to handicap this bloody thing. America, you’ve thrown me for a loop!

Twitch could be the guy going home tonight, since he was in the Bottom 2 last week and seems to be relying on his personality as much as his technique. Then again, voters upset by his recent close call could rally behind him.

And once upon a time, I’d have thought Courtney would be outta here (and she still might be, given her presence in the danger zone last week).

But she’s got a dark horse thing going on right now, and the fact that she and Mark delivered what I thought was one of the best routines of the season—that wild French burlesque number by my new favorite choreographer Sonya—could work in her favor.

Don’t get me wrong, Chelsie and Katee have a strong cult behind them and they’ve been more consistently spectacular than Courtney throughout the season.

Still—and it seems weird to say this—their steady display of talent may not be enough to win. It’s unbelievable that I’m now kind of bored by yet another hot, swivel-hipped Latin number by Chelsie.

At the moment, I’m more wowed by someone like Joshua.

Like Courtney, he’s had a great arc on the show, improving every week, never losing his charm and nailing pretty much everything they throw his way.

Which is pretty spectacular, since—as the judges kept reminding themselves and the rest of us—Joshua’s had no classical training. (Which I suspect isn’t 100% accurate, but whatever.)

Take a look at his solo.

As I’ve said before, the solo part of the contest is kind of filler for me. It rarely sways the way I feel about any dancer, given that they have less than a minute to shine and it’s usually the same thing week after week.

But last night, Joshua totally exploded on that stage.

He started off slow, working the crowd and then—BAM!—like a lightning strike, he kicked into gear. He showed off a few brilliant flips, and then proceeded to shake his money-maker like no one’s business. (Who cares if he’s got the biggest booty up there? He knows how to work it, boy!)

Quite an amazing feat, considering he crammed all that into a scant 30 seconds.

Plus, that paso doble with Katee?

HOOOOT!

So what the heck will happen tonight? You’ve got me.

But one thing’s for sure: The Top 6 went out of their way to prove their worth last night.
And you know what? I might just be getting on board with the judges when they say that all of the dancers are so good, any one of them deserves to win.

(Photos courtesy of FOX) 

America, have you gone stark raving MAD?!?

WILL eliminated? TWITCH in danger? MARK safe?

Are you INSANE?!?

Fine, you got one right: Comfort—the dancer who’s completely overstayed her welcome—got the hook. And Courtney’s fabulous, but she’s been in danger a few times now, so it wasn’t a surprise to see her dancing a solo.

But WILL?!? Uh, the guy who the judges—and TVGuide.com readers—pegged as the one to possibly win the whole gosh-darn competition?

This is beyond wrong. I mean, I’m all for a shake-up, believe me, but not at the expense of cutting one of the show’s biggest talents. Mia called him “genius,” for cripe’s sake!

Even MARK couldn’t believe he wasn’t going home, dizzily repeating “What? What?” as Cat sent him offstage to safety.

Not that Joshua and Mark are bad dancers, mind you. Not at all. But at this stage in the contest, someone’s got to go, and it’s just the person who isn’t quite as good as the others.

And sorry, boys, neither of you are Will Wingfield—or even Twitch Boss for that matter.

So what the heck happened?

Nigel tried to explain how Will and Twitch, who he called the show’s best male dancers, wound up in the Bottom 2. His theory: Maybe they were too good, and fans figured they didn’t need to call and vote.

Whatever the reason, it’s a sad, sad day for Season 4. You can debate the overall winners of previous “Dance” seasons—Benji vs. Travis, Sabra vs. Danny—but I honestly can’t remember another season where I didn’t think voters got the final few contestants right.

Sure, as Cat Deeley keeps reminding us, the show’s searching for America’s FAVORITE dancer.

But surely, that should mean that the best one should at least make it to the finale, right?

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

But I’m guessing those two need to jump off now, if only because the show’s little locomotive needs to chug into the “Dance” station to bring two more contestants home.

And unless America has jumped on the Crazy Train, those two will be Mark and Comfort.

In my view, last night’s show pretty much confirmed three of the Final Four dancers: Will, Katee and Twitch. The last slot will probably go Chelsie. (Unless I’m mistaken, and the show lifts its weekly “one guy, one girl” elimination rule next week. If so, she’ll fight it out with Joshua.)

Will and Katee are, inarguably, the most technical dancers on the show. But can they match Twitch in charisma? Hard to say. But one thing is definite: Those three brought the best performances of the night.

First off, Nigel nailed it when he said Twitch and Katee delivered one of the most entertaining routines EVER on the show with their Mia Michaels contemporary number.

Just earlier this week, I was noting that this season hasn’t brought too many memorable moments so far, especially when compared with the Emmy nominated ones from last season. I stand corrected.

Because that kick-butt number totally rocked, from Katee’s Amy Winehouse-inspired beehive and eyeliner to Twitch’s laid-back sneer! I’d have liked Katee to get a bit more psycho ex-girlfriend, but other than that, these two were fan-freakin’-tastic.

How could you not love that one move, where Katee was hanging onto the door when Twitch slammed it? Brilliant. And that hot smooch at the beginning? Yeah, baby, yeah!

(And yes, Nigel, I would like to know what goes through Mia Michaels’ head. In fact, I’d like to take Mia and Mary Murphy out for a martini or five one night and see what flies out of their mouths. I’m guessing it would be the best night ever.)

As for Will, I was less in love with his routines with Courtney than the judges were. Their samba was fine, but that’s all, and frankly, I was expecting the judges to slam their slow hip-hop as being emotionless.

Maybe it just didn’t translate for the at-home audience, but I got nothing out of what was supposed to be an emotional number.

Looking at those pictures of her dead lover, Courtney could have been reminiscing about a fun night at the sorority house for all I knew: “You guys! Remember when Tiffany got so wasted, she barfed in Lauren’s hair and we couldn’t get it out? Good times…” She certainly wasn’t making me tear up over someone who’s passed away.

No, it was his solo where Will really stood out. Yes, some might have called it a schlocky James Brown impersonation, but it was still damn fun!

And that counts for a lot in a season where I’ve desperately wanted to hit the fast-forward button during all of the solos because they’re so boring and predictable. (For example: Comfort—same ol’ popping and locking—and Courtney—standard contemporary emotional/sexy head whips with one arm around the neck.)

As for the rest of the numbers, I didn’t really agree with the judges—including guest judge Toni “M-I-C-K-E-Y” Basil, WHEE!—on most of them. (P.S. It is me, or has Toni had so much work done that she looks like a complete alien life form?)

Except for that one wild airplane lift, I didn’t think Chelsie and Joshua did so well with disco; Joshua, in fact, looked like he was about to collapse halfway through, despite his “strength.” Their tango was pretty good, but not out of this world. And Katee and Twitch’s Sweet Georgia Brown was cute as a button, but I wouldn’t have called it terrific. (I thought Katee’s “rockin’ the boat” Broadway number with Will from the other week was far better.)

Then there was the hip-hop “detention” number by Mark and Comfort. Were the judges high?!? These two weren’t in sync at all, especially in the beginning. And it seemed like they had more desperation than joy in them, despite Toni Basil’s comments. Mark’s “stank face” looked just like he smelled something bad; he was completely anti-ghetto.

The judges must have woken up from their stupor, though, when these two sailed—or rather, sank—onstage for a fox trot. Nigel was being kind when he said they were “slightly amateurish.” Comfort’s never looked comfortable in genres like this, but Mark was truly a surprise disaster.

(And note to the wardrobe department, which is apparently obsessed with feather-covered costumes this season: Either find an anti-molting solution, or do away with the bird outfits.)

With that, does anyone think Comfort or Mark WON’T go home tonight? Mark’s as close as you can get to a sure thing, but Comfort’s always been a wild card. As she said last night, she’s a fighter.

Could Courtney be the one hitting the road?

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

To summarize (with enthusiasm):

Jessica suffers an injury and is out of the race!

She’s replaced by Comfort!

Comfort actually makes it through to next week, and—SHOCKER!—Kherington gets sent home instead. (Guess America just liked the Twitch part of Twitchington.)

Nigel choreographs a routine all by himself! (And two assistants.)

The show nabs FOUR Emmy nods! (Keep reading for more details on that one.)

Oh yeah, and Gev was eliminated, too. Nothing against the guy, but everyone on the planet knew it was either him or Mark saying sayonara. And Mark is likely packing his dance shoes as we speak.

But here’s the big question: Is anyone actually pleased to see Comfort back on the stage? I guess the rest of America is, but I have to admit that I’m not.

I was a huge fan of Comfort’s in the early weeks, as were the judges, who touted her over and over as the best hip-hop girl they’ve seen on the show. Yet she’s nowhere near as versatile as, say, Season 2’s hip-hop gal, Donyelle. Hip-hop is all Comfort can do, and even in that genre, she’s been uneven in this competition.

That’s why Comfort got booted two weeks back when the judges still had control over things. True, she redeemed herself partially this week, but she was helped along by not one, but THREE, strokes of luck (Jessica’s injury, a pairing with Twitch and pulling hip-hop out of the hat as one of their genres).

And let’s face it: that smooth waltz was horrifying.

America didn’t care, though, or maybe they just were cheering for Comfort because she’s the underdog. Or maybe they were just sick of seeing Kherington’s smile.

Should Kherington have been the one to go, though? Possibly. She gave two of her worst performances last week, but personally, I’d have taken her past work into consideration and let her advance at least one more step.

We’ll see if this week’s round is as action-packed as last week. Who will be the ones to go this time?

Mark, for sure, right? And will the next girl be Comfort or Courtney? Or will there be another upset, with Katee or Chelsie getting the boot?

I’m can’t wait for Thursday’s results show, if only because L.L. Cool J. is performing his new song. I’d prefer an old-school “Going Back to Cali” or “Mama Said Knock You Out,” but beggars can’t be choosers. At least it’s not the Pussycat Dolls again.

And oh yes, the Emmy news! The show snagged four nominations: one for makeup, and the others for three of last season’s most memorable routines. Kudos to Shane Sparks, Mandy Moore and Wade Robson —oops, looks like last year’s winner, Mia Michaels, got snubbed!

So what were the nominated routines? Click on the following links to check out the performances on YouTube!

(And not to hate on the show or anything, but after watching these again, I don’t think anything so far this season has captured me as much – except maybe, MAYBE, the Bollywood routine by Joshua and Katee.)

• Hummingbird and Flower/”The Chairman’s Waltz”: Wade Robson, choreographer. Performed by Jaimie and Hok.

• “Fuego”: Shane Sparks, choreographer. Performed by Pasha and Lauren.

• “Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)”: Mandy Moore, choreographer. Performed by Neil and Sabra.

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

But we didn’t really need an official announcement to know who was outta there, right? Bye-bye, Comfort and Thayne.

Maybe it was his constant grin or horrible sideburns that annoyed me, but Thayne never struck me as anything special—despite getting major love from the judges. Mia Michaels, in particular.

But once it came down to Thayne, Will and Twitch? Honey, please.

That was probably the easiest decision Nigel & Co. have made all season, despite all that pretend agony.

Personally, I thought Comfort was the real disappointment of last night’s two dismissed dancers. There’s a star in her just trying to break out, but it never got loose. Not during the competitive routines anyway: The only times she’s ripped up the joint lately is during Thursday’s opening numbers. At this stage in the game, though, we couldn’t wait for magic to happen anymore.

But you know who I REALLY felt sorry for last night? Jessica.

I don’t even like her much, but man, girlfriend just can’t catch a break from those mean ol’ judges. When Nigel was dismissing Thayne, he said that the judges were unanimous in their decision. Then he added that they would rather have cut two girls than him.

In other words, if the rules had allowed it, Comfort and Jessica would have been eliminated.

Jeez, couldn’t they have given the poor girl 3o seconds to enjoy the fact that she made the Top 10? And they keep complaining that one of Jessica’s problems is confidence. Well, telling her that she stinks every five minutes probably isn’t a boost to her self-esteem.

It’ll be interesting to see what happens to her next week, when all the partners are split up. Maybe she’ll shine without suffering that constant comparison to Wonder Boy Will. Or she could fall flat on her face without him to prop her up.

Either way, now’s when the game starts getting really, really good. There hasn’t been much suspense in the eliminations yet, but as Nigel pointed out last night: No one is safe now.

I’m on vacation next week—YAY!—so I won’t be around to ruminate on the performances. But I’ll be back and ready to rhumba the week after that.

Dance on, team!!

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

After tonight’s contestants are booted, we’ll have our Top 10, the dancers who get to go on the national tour, which kicks off this fall.

Not to mention that all bets are off after this week, because the current partners will be split up and the dancers will be relying more on their own individual charisma and talent.

Which is a good thing for dancers like Comfort, who’s been pretty lazy lately, but she’s also been saddled with the worst guys in the bunch week after week. It’s a bad thing for gals like Jessica, who—as Mia Michaels so bluntly pointed out last night—has been carried by her partner, Will, since the start.

Of course, that’s if Comfort and Jessica actually make it to next week—and I’ll bet one of them says bye-bye tonight. And unless one of the other boys kicks Nigel in the head during the solos, we all know Thayne is going home, too.

Which means, obviously, that my guess is that Comfort and Thayne, plus Jessica and Will, will be in the Bottom 3 couples tonight.

As for the other two in danger? Anything goes at this point, who—despite the harsh criticism—are pretty amazing. And much will depend on the popularity of the couple—or the hatred of any individual in a pair.

If you go by the judges’ comments, every couple except Chelsie and Mark and Courtney and Gev gave uneven performances. Then again, C & G have been in the Bottom 3 before—so does America just not love ‘em enough?

What do you think, fans? Let’s review the guys and girls to get our brains pumping…

CHELSIE and MARK

These two were smokin,’ yet again. Both of their dances—a salsa and Broadway routine—were hot little numbers, which showed off their awesome chemistry. (And their great bods: I think Mark was showing almost as much skin as Chelsie in that cut-to-the-navel jumpsuit.)

Mary called Chelsie a “beautiful firecracker” and Mia said she was so gorgeous, she wanted to “stab her.” (Down, girls.) Mark is probably the weak link in this pairing, but as the judges pointed out, he’s such a great performer, his attitude glosses over any technical flaws. I’d be shocked if they didn’t sail through to next week.

COMFORT and THAYNE

Another new pairing, another disaster for Comfort. And I think she might just be disgusted as we are, because no matter what she says, she doesn’t even seem to be trying anymore. She got a hip-hop routine, for goodness sake! She should have blasted Thayne off the stage, even if it meant risking the judges saying she should be a better partner. At this point for her, whoever that partner is doesn’t matter anymore.

Neither routine—the second was a Mandy Moore contemporary—showed any kind of connection between the two, so both Comfort and Thayne should have just danced well individually. Yet they couldn’t even do that.

Ah well, it was nice knowing you, Thayne. And the ONLY way Comfort is squeaking through this week is if she tears up tonight’s solo—and the judges think she may have something more interesting to offer than Jessica on her own, now that the partners will be split up next week.

WILL and JESSICA

Thank God Will and Jessica had that first routine, a sparse but incredible take on the Garden of Eden. When Will stepped out in a loincloth, you knew it was going to be good. And it was: As Nigel said, the piece was erotic and stunning. It reminded me of Katee and Joshua’s number by Mia last week, when they were able to capture the audience by barely moving. Mary called it one of the best numbers ever on the show.

Eek! Then all that goodwill (no pun intended) got shot to hell with that revolting quickstep: Maybe Cat Deeley jinxed them by calling the genre the show’s “kiss of death.” (And hello, Cat, we knew that already, you didn’t have to make the dancers more nervous by pointing it out to everyone beforehand.)

I didn’t think they were as awful as the judges made it seem—the American Bandstand, ‘50s vibe was sort of cute. But they got slammed on all counts, and Mia was ruthless: She may as well have said that Jessica needs to go home.

But will America agree? I don’t think Will’s charm will save them from the Bottom 3 this time, but he’s surely safe from getting cut. The judges love him—just not THEM—too much.

COURTNEY and GEV

Unlike Chelsie and Mark, who are consistently great week after week, Courtney and Gev just keep improving. I’ll wager last night’s performances were their best so far: That cha-cha was sultry enough to put them on Mary’s Hot Tamale Train. (And again, a plunging neckline on a guy: Between Mark and Gev, the stylists were ga-ga for man cleavage last night.)

Nigel called them the “best suited couple” of the bunch. Mia called their cha-cha “fabulosity at its best.” (P.S. Anyone else think that Mia’s just desperately throwing out made-up phrases and hoping one catches on, like Cat’s “jidges” and Mary’s HTT?)

And that “lost in the jungle” jazz routine was dynamic and entertaining, from the first moment Gev burst out of the wings. Now that’s what I’m talking about! These two seem to be dancing for their lives all the time, and that’s what makes them great competitors.

Plus, I have to confess a certain bias for C&G now: I’m a native Long Islander like Courtney, and I had a totally awesome ‘80s flashback when they danced to “Standing There” by the Creatures! (That was the side project for Siouxsie Sioux and Budgie of Siouxsie and the Banshees. Yes, I was a New Wave/Goth girl. I have pictures to prove it. They aren’t pretty.)

TWITCHINGTON

Just like Will and Jessica, this normally can-do-no-wrong couple had a so-so night. Their first krump number was wild—and just like last week, you had to hand it to Kherington for kicking it up a notch or two. She was a completely believable dirty, filthy, stank girl, which, according to Mia, is a good thing when it comes to krumping.

But that smooth tango just might have doomed them to the Bottom 3. It as all over the place, and they looked about as comfortable as gazelles at a lion convention. They were supposed to be assassins—a la Brangelina in Mr. & Mrs. Smith. But to quote Nigel: “You murdered the dance routine tonight, not each other.” Ouch!

KATEE and JOSHUA

Katee appears to be the girls’ frontrunner these days. The judges just love her: The girl can do no wrong with them. To me, she’s kind of  like Sabra, who won the competition last year. Was she the best dancer? Absolutely. (Though Danny fans may disagree with me.) But neither Sabra nor Katee have a strong enough personality to make me want to root for them.

Anyway, the judges certainly are rooting for Katee: Mia called her “a gift” after the couple’s waltz. They were harder on Joshua, with Nigel noting that he was too “bouncy.”

Then, whammo! He and Katee hit a home run with the show’s final number: A Bollywood performance, which had never been done on the show before.  And with his B-boy background, Joshua was able to redeem himself. (I’d never realized how similar the Indian moves were to hip-hop, either, until Nigel pointed it out.)

But what this number really proved to me is that the show is somewhat slanted: For the most part, I’ll believe that the couple’s draw of genre from the hat is honest. Yet do any of you believe for a second that if, say, Comfort and Thayne had drawn this Bollywood number, they wouldn’t have been asked to pick again?

Ponder that, Dancerinos, and tune in here tomorrow for a recap of tonight’s eliminations!

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

So I’ll be brief: Kourtni and Matt were the ones sent packing tonight.

Not shocking, right? Kourtni herself didn’t even seem surprised to go, even if she did show more oomph than ever in her solo.

Let’s face it: This couple’s been on thin ice for weeks now.

As for the other two girls in the Bottom 3, Comfort’s on borrowed time. She didn’t even get Nigel’s vote tonight, and he was once one of her big fans. Courtney’s sweet, lovely and talented—and was only in danger because someone else had to be. Still, it’s likely she doesn’t have more than another week or two left in her, either.

And the guys? It was down to Matt and Thayne, and I’ll bet Matt was dismissed more on the basis of his dismal pairing with Kourtni than tonight’s solo. (Which means that Thayne should consider his days numbered.)

Anyway, that’s the 30-second round-up, folks! Tune in next week when we’re down to the Dirty Dozen … WHOO HOO!

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

Will and Twitch, shirtless! (Man, who knew these two were so ripped?!?)

Kherington stomping around in thigh-high boots!

Heck, Twitchington rolling around on a bed covered in rose petals!

Chelsie and Mark blowing kisses!

Man, the seven remaining couples brought it big time last night, proving that it’s getting harder and harder to say which ones are going all the way to the finals.

As for who’ll be in danger of going home tonight? It shows how great these dancers  are when I can only say one couple is a sure bet for solos: Kourtni and Matt.

As for the other two possibilities, I’d guess Comfort, Thayne, Courtney and Gev will be dancing for their lives. Anything goes at this point, though, and things will start getting really interesting when the show starts to break up partners—and dancers start to perform more on their own.

That said, let’s do the usual Wednesday night breakdown, shall we?

JESSICA and WILL

Their first dance was the jive, and this bouncy little number didn’t bounce so well off the judges. They even semi-criticized Will, who can usually do no wrong. But wow, did these two make a major comeback with their second routine, choreographed by Mandy Moore.

Props to the props, Mandy, because that trick with the shirt totally worked! It was clever, smooth, sexy and difficult—having Will loop that shirt around Jessica’s arm and pulling her across the floor with it was tremendous. Mary Murphy summed it all up when she put these two on the—you guessed it—Hot Tamale Train.

The only downer came from Napolean (a guest judge with wife/partner Tabitha) when he noted that Jessica is still bringing Will down. It’s true, but even I would have cut the girl a break after that fantastic effort.

COMFORT and THAYNE

These two brought their A-game to the show last night with a Broadway number and a smooth waltz. Were they better than last week? Abso-freakin-lutely. Did they show that they can adapt to different genres? You betcha. Were their performances good enough to push them out of the danger zone? Doubt it.

Napolean and Tabitha were spot on when they pegged Comfort and Thayne as a good match-up. Still, their Broadway number didn’t measure up: Nigel was unhappy that their classic take on West Side Story didn’t show as much passion and aggression as the original. He even went so far as to say they’d be booed off Broadway.

Their waltz was better, as proved by expert Mary Murphy’s screech of approval. The opening lift was amazing, and even though Comfort was way outside her element, she looked completely comfortable. (No pun intended! Well, maybe a small one.)

But again, Napolean nailed the problem with Thayne: Sometimes he looks fake. Based on his past performances, odds are pretty good he’ll be the guy going home tonight.

 KOURTNI and MATT

I’m not a big fan of the kind of “slow jam” hip-hop routine that Kourtni and Matt was handed for their first number, but as Mary Murphy pointed out, slow and smooth doesn’t mean you should put the audience to sleep. Not only was the overall performance a snore, their moves weren’t even in sync.

And when given the opportunity to really set the stage on fire with a mambo, they only managed to get the temperature up to lukewarm. They needed to bring the sexy, and they didn’t. Which was even more apparent when compared to couples like Will and Jessica and Twitchington.

Kournti and Matt are prepping their solos as we speak, but hey, they’re used to it by now, right?

CHELSIE and MARK

These two were cute as bugs in a rug during their “Kiss Kiss” routine, showing that they are one of the best pairings in the competition right now. Nigel called them “magic” together. Mary said some gibberish about Chelsie Hightower, towering towering, which made no sense at all except to convey that she LOVED THEM!!!

And you’ve gotta give a hand to a couple who can make the foxtrot—usually a kiss of death in this contest—entertaining. Chelsie even danced with a feather in her mouth, which I wouldn’t have noticed if Tabitha hadn’t mentioned it. Now that’s a pro.

KHERINGTON and TWITCH

You all know I love me some Twitch, but I’m thinking Kherington may have surpassed her partner this week. She showed she’s got a lot more inside her than just being a future spokesmodel for Crest toothpaste. She was a fierce matador in the paso doble, giving some serious attitude. Way to work those boots, honey!

And in that second Mia Michaels routine? Sweet little Kherington turned into a heartbreaker! (And hey, seeing Twitch without a shirt wasn’t too bad, either.)

Katee and Joshua fans may argue with me, but to me, that number was the best of the night. As Tabitha said, “Awesome, awesome, awesome, awesome, awesome, awesome.”

KATEE and JOSHUA

But … the trophy for Best Performance last night could have easily gone to Katee and Joshua with their first contemporary number (even if I personally liked Twitchington’s bedroom romp a tiny bit more). Look, when you get a Mia Michaels piece, you’ve already got an edge, but they truly did own the stage with this one. T&N got it right: You have to be amazing dancers to hold an audience’s attention when you’re barely moving.

As for their second West Coast swing routine—choreographed by Mr. Benji Schwimmer, assisted by Lacey!—they performed a great feat by dragging my attention away from those horrible Pepto Bismol costumes. That last move where Katee hip-checked Joshua across the floor was fantastic. To quote Nigel: “Well done.”

COURTNEY and GEV

I’ve come to the conclusion that “Dance” needs to send Olisa and Cecily back to New York, because I hate every routine they choreograph.  The judges weren’t feeling this hip-hop number, yet I don’t think it wasn’t completely the dancers’ fault.

And I wouldn’t have been quite so hard on Courtney: Just because she wasn’t “ghetto” doesn’t mean she didn’t do a playful, hard-hitting job. I’m actually surprised they didn’t slam Gev harder—for a hip-hopper, he was sleepwalking through that one.

Their Broadway number was a lot better, though. They played the role of wide-eyed tourists in New York well, without going overboard, and they really zoomed across that stage. That number was exhausting: I’ll bet that last  flop onto the floor wasn’t too far away from how these two really felt.

Yet, I’m thinking Courtney and Gev will be in the Bottom 3 couples tonight, if only because three have to be.  The competition is so stiff now, those in danger won’t be the ones who danced badly anymore. They’ll be the ones who didn’t bring something special enough to their performances.

So get set for another elimination round tonight! And hopefully, the lovely Cat Deeley won’t be dressed as Betty Boop tonight…

(Photos courtesy of FOX) 

Chelsea Traille is the gal going home, and Chris Jarosz is saying see ya, too.

After six solos that, quite frankly, reeked of desperation—the judges must have scared the bejeezus into them last week about the seriousness of “dancing for your life”—the judges quickly dumped Chelsea.

She probably wasn’t surprised. It was her time to go, since her performances haven’t improved much, no matter what the genre.

Last night also showed how quickly this contest is narrowing. Because unless some major upset or injury happens, I’m guessing the next girls to be booted will be in the order they were chosen for the Bottom 3 last night—Comfort, then Kourtni.

As for Chris, did anyone truly think he wasn’t leaving?

Nigel said what we were all thinking: Matt, you’re brilliant—go sit down. We all know it’s down to Chris and Thayne.

Even I’ve got to admit Thayne gave it his all in his solo. Chris was fine, and that’s sort of the point. He’s just fine. Vanilla-bean Boy just couldn’t manage to distinguish himself; he didn’t even seem to know how to try. So he was sent packing.

His elimination also marked the first time any of the couples have been split up, which means that Comfort will partner with Thayne next week. Now, Comfort and Chris were a mismatch from the start, and I suspect that the judges have kept her around because they see a lot of potential in her with a different guy.

But Thayne? That’s not exactly the best connection, either, and when Nigel announced that pairing, I’ll bet Comfort sighed and said, “Oh well, it was nice while it lasted….”

Anyway, now that we’re down to the Top 14, do you think it’s becoming more apparent who’ll be the Final Four?

I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised if this ended up being an all-guy, or, at least an almost all-guy, season finale.

Because the way this competition is going, it’ll take a train wreck—of the Hot Tamale Train, perhaps?—to stop the momentum of Will, Joshua and Twitch…

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

Our favorite overexcited, bedazzled judge—who, as guest judge Adam Shankman put it, looked like a “pretty disco ball”—told us at the top of last night’s show that this season’s dancers were all so good that it’s hard to say who’ll get the boot each week.

But after watching those performances—which, for the most part, were pretty darn good—I’ll bet Mary now agrees with Nigel: Chelsea and Thayne need to prepare their solos for tonight.

And I think they should pack their suitcases, too.

What other couples should be in the Bottom 3 tonight? Comfort and Chris, for sure.

They spoiled what should have been a totally original, kick-butt number. The performance was memorable not because of their moves, but because of the unique choreography and song choice. (African jazz set to Marilyn Manson’s “Beautiful People?” Freakin’ brilliant, Tyce DiOrio!)

As for the last couple in danger?

My money’s on Kourtni and Matt. They actually did a really good job with their “comic book” characters, but were they good enough?

I’ll say that the last couple will be these two, or Jessica and Will—but the latter couple got the more popular disco genre. Not to mention Will’s forming enough of a fan base that he’ll likely pull them through another week.

Who were the best of the night? To me, the race was neck-and-neck between the final two couples: Chelsie and Mark and Katee and Joshua—but I’ll give the edge to Chelsie and Mark.

That said, let’s break it down as usual—couple by couple.

COUPLE ONE: TWITCH and KHERINGTON

(Hip-hop by Tabitha and Napolean)

Twitchington finally broke the curse of dancing first, which had guaranteed a slot in the Bottom 3 for the past few weeks. Was their Busta Rhymes number totally “banoodles,” as Mia Michaels might have said? Nope. But they did rock quite a few steps. (I loved the almost-but-not-quite tripping off the stage move. ) Adam said it best: They knew when to “hit it hard” and when to “lay back.”

Personally, I thought Kherington was pulling some unnecessary faces to make up for the fact that she’s as gangsta as a great-grandma. But what are you gonna do when the girl’s as cute as a bunny and a great dancer to boot?

COUPLE TWO: COURTNEY and GEV

(Rhumba, Tony Meredith and Melanie)

These two make a great couple. The judges said it all: They had great chemistry, real passion and, hey, some killer lines! I’d take exception with the judges on their very first step—Courtney’s slide down Gev’s back seemed clunky and labored to me—but it was smooth sailing after that. They were hot, hot, hot. Mary put Katee and Joshua on the Hot Tamale Train, but I’d put Courtney and Gev in the seats next to them.

COUPLE THREE: COMFORT and CHRIS

(Jazz, Tyce DiOrio)

The reason Comfort and Chris should be in danger tonight can be summed up in one word: disappointing.

They weren’t terrible, but this routine had the potential to be one of the season’s best. So it was really disheartening when Comfort and Chris failed to bring the energy it needed. As the judges pointed out, they started out fine—then they just kind of laid down and died. Mary was right: They should have been crazy up there. Instead of becoming African warriors, they were more like little kids playing at war.

COUPLE FOUR: JESSICA and WILL

(Disco, Doriana Sanchez)

Everyone keeps talking about how disco is really difficult and underrated, and maybe that’s true, because no one seems to be able to completely nail Doriana’s routines. (Or maybe she needs to adapt a little so the contestants don’t look quite so inadequate out there.)

True, Will’s Travolta point was absolutely on point, and his flip towards the end was amazing. I’d even say Jessica brought her A-game to the routine, although she’s still the lesser half of this pairing.

Still, with all that, there just seemed to be something lacking. Maybe it was just me, but I felt underwhelmed.

COUPLE FIVE: KOURTNI and MATT

(Contemporary, Sonya Tayeh)

First off, I’ve just got to get my comments about that crazy new choreographer out of the way: Love, love, love me some Sonya!

Maybe it’s her wild Mohawk, which makes her look like she’s the lead singer of 80s band Bow Bow Bow reincarnated. I totally wanted her to start singing “I Want Candy.” Or maybe it was her total unembarrassed enthusiasm for being on the show. Either way, this routine showed she’s a great addition to the choreography roster.

The comic book hero conceit was fun, quirky and different: That move where Kourtni pulled on Matt’s tie with her teeth (see above) was adorably weird. But as Nigel pointed out, will America get it? I’m not sure, either.

They might be in the Bottom 3 simply because someone has to be, which is a shame. But I guess it’s better to be there with a really good number, rather than a terrible one. Which leads us to…

COUPLE SIX: CHELSEA and THAYNE

(Quickstep, Heather Smith)

Yes, they drew a terrible dance card with the quickstep. It’s difficult, it’s fast, it’s no crowd-pleaser. But it’s not like these two have been raising the roof with the other genres. I hate to be a hater, but once again, Chelsea and Thayne were awful.

They hopped around looking like they’d rather be in prison than on that stage. (They could have borrowed Twitchington’s jail break costumes!)

Adam’s right: You might be uncomfortable up there, but you can’t look like it. To paraphrase “Project Runway,” they should have made it work. And they didn’t. At all.

(Plus, Thayne was really annoying in their pre-dance video, but that’s a whole other personality issue…)

COUPLE SEVEN: CHELSIE and MARK

(Hip-hop, Tabitha and Napolean)

This really was brilliant choreography, and unlike Comfort and Chris, these two got it completely, totally right. They stayed completely in character, and as the judges pointed out, their struggle was believable all the way through the routine. Chelsie, in particular, had wonderfully pained expressions without overdoing it. I’m with Adam: They’re the couple to beat.
COUPLE EIGHT: KATEE and JOSHUA

(Samba, Tony Meredith and Melanie)

Katee and Joshua brought the sexy back from their very first move. That tap on the shoulder? That leg in the air? Hello, hotness! They deserved those first-class tickets on Mary’s Hot Tamale Train. Did I think they were the best? Sorry, gotta give that to Chelsie and Mark, mostly because their dance was also a character study that required them to act, too. And while Katee was strong for the most part, I think her confidence got slightly shaky in the middle. Overall, though, it was an exciting, naturally sexy number that definitely puts them in the “couple to beat” contention.

But we’ll see what America thought tonight, won’t we?

And just for the record, let me vent about two minor quibbles:

• I love Cat Deeley and all, but she really needs to stop making the audience say “jidges.” It was cute for awhile, but we get it now, you’re British.

• And the judges must stop patting the choreographers’ backs during their criticism of each number. We know you’re being polite and don’t want to offend them, but let’s face it, sometimes a routine just sucks—and it’s not necessarily all the dancers’ fault. And come on, these folks are pros who’ve been in the business for awhile. They’ve all got skin as thick as a rhino’s, and won’t go home crying if Nigel doesn’t get their hip-hop/jazz/contemporary vision. That, and I’m sure they’re being paid a bundle for their services.

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

But unlike last week, America got the Bottom Three couples right—and the judges sent home the wrong two.

I actually can’t believe I’m defending the elimination of Susie and Marquis, two finalists who I never thought were going to get very far in this contest anyway. There are just too many more personable, exciting dancers (Joshua, Will, Twitch, Kherington) whipping around on that stage.

Still, when you had to choose from the six who were in danger, combined with their individual performances last night, Susie and Marquis deserved to stick around for at least another week.

So let’s start with the three couples who got the fewest votes, all of whom I said were the ones who should be battling it out for survival:

• Chelsea and Thayne

• Marquis and Susie

• Chris and Comfort

All three couples definitely had lackluster performances, so it was great to see the shining stars from Wednesday move on easily to next week. (But what about that moment where we all thought Kourtni and Matt or Jessica and Will were in the Bottom 3? Except they were safe! For shame, you big meanie, Cat Deeley!)

One thing I thought was interesting about the show’s recap of the couples’ performances was how the judges’ comments about Chris and Comfort were carefully edited to focus only on Chris. Yes, they busted big-time on Chris—and rightly so—but if I recall correctly, they also gave Comfort a couple of well-deserved jabs for not hitting the number hard enough.

But do I think Comfort should have been the girl to go? Nope. That should have been Chelsea, hands down.

Chelsea has talent, no doubt, but was she “a firecracker” during her solo, as Cat Deeley called her? No way. Cat and the judges must have been asleep, because what I watched was a routine that was all over the place and boring to boot.

(And this could be said of any number of contestants who’ve danced solos so far, but why, oh why, would you choose a slow song to showcase your skills when you’ve got less than a minute to do so? Pump up the volume, kids!)

But the judges felt differently, telling Chelsea simply that she needed to step it up and whisking her off to safety.

So it came down to Susie and Comfort, and when given that choice, yes, I’d pick Comfort six days a week and Sunday.

Truly, though, it was Susie who really “danced for her life.” She chose a fun, upbeat song, she looked like she was having fun and she put those swivel hips back in business.

And I’ll take exception with the criteria the judges used to pick Comfort over Susie. Nigel said that Comfort hasn’t found her potential in this contest—but that she came alive during the opening Shane Sparks routine. And the girl did totally rock the house during that incredible number: She was up there killing it with three guys, not only holding her own but often besting their moves.

I’ll agree that the judges’ point is that you have to bring it EVERY time you’re on that stage, but doesn’t that diminish the importance of the solos a bit?

Long story short, the show set up a showdown between Susie and Comfort—which was no contest—when it really should have come down to Susie and Chelsea. In any case, Susie’s the one headed home.

As for the guys, what can I say except that it was totally unfair for Nigel to brand Marquis’ solo as being “all tricks.”

They’ve never had a problem with that before, and Marquis has shown that he’s got amazing lines and movement in his previous performances. So who can fault the guy for trying to show something different with a few somersaults? And that one where he flipped from a standing to sitting position was insane! I’m guessing the rest of the dancers are all scratching their heads, wondering what tactic to take in their solos from now on.

Basically, the man to go should have been either Thayne and Chris. They’re talented as can be, but to me, they’re also as vanilla as yogurt.

The most interesting thing about Thayne are his sideburns.

And according to the judges, Chris has been showing more personality? Come on, the boy is so generic he wore khaki shorts during his solo.

So if it were my call, I would have booted Chris—if only because he’s dragging Comfort down, and it would have been interesting to see her paired with Marquis. Though I can’t quite see him krumping either.

Ah, well. A fair elimination? Not exactly. But that’s entertainment, folks!

Until next week, when the Top 16 get down and dirty…and by the way, are any contestants starting to emerge as your favorites?

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

Now, we’re starting to see more personality from the finalists, both on and off the stage. And for some —Jessica, I’m talking to you—they’d better bring some of that off-stage pizazz to their performances, or they’ll be saying sayonara really soon.

That said, even though it’s still early stages, the judges officially anointed two front-runners last night: Will and Joshua. Nigel announced that he’d be surprised if these two aren’t in the Final Four, and from their work last night, I’m inclined to use Mia Michaels’ new terminology and deem them “banoodles.”

The judges went crazy over the Broadway show-stopper done by Katee and Joshua, saying they were hands-down the best pair of the night.

I wasn’t quite as bowled over, but maybe that’s because I’m no fan of the genre. Still, it was obvious at how much stamina it took for the two to get through that marathon dance—and they did it with genuine smiles on their faces.

It didn’t go quite as well for Thayne and Chelsea, who were—in my opinion,—the worst of the night.

Maybe there’s something about snagging that first slot that’s the kiss of death, but the Henry the Eighth meets the ‘80s routine was awful.

Their jazz dance was supposed to be about passionate, forbidden love? Chelsea came off more as the royal in that number, rather than Thayne. And she seemed more like a queen who was dismissing a mildly interesting pageboy.

So here’s my take on who SHOULD be in the bottom three couples tonight, though we all know that America has its own ideas:

• Thayne and Chelsea

• Susie and Marquis

• Comfort and Chris

Find out my reasons why when I break it down, couple by couple…

COUPLE ONE: THAYNE and CHELSEA
(Jazz, choreographed by Mandy Moore)

I said it all above: If these two aren’t in the Bottom Three tonight, I’ll be shocked. To me, they were mediocre last week, even though Mary Murphy put them on the hot tamale train. But that performance must have sucked up all their chemistry, because last night, they had absolutely nada.

COUPLE TWO: CHELSIE and MARK

(Argentine tango, Alex Da Silva)

This has turned out to be a really beautiful pairing, with Chelsie and Mark nailing Mia Michaels’ wedding dance last week as well as this fiery tango. Mia proclaimed that she’s “in love” with the duo, and Mary said Mark looked like a movie star. Nigel would have liked to have seen a bit more “sleeze”—loved that!—and a bit more passion from Chelsie. Otherwise, these two seem to be one of the couples to beat.

COUPLE THREE: JESSICA and WILL
(Hip-hop, Cecily and Olivia)

Let me digress for a moment to wonder whether Nicole Scherzinger of the Pussycat Dolls is paying anyone on the “Dance” staff to be constantly featured on this show. She sang this tune—one of her solo efforts—on last year’s finale, and the Dolls were just on last week. Enough already!

That said, this pairing—unlike the one that performed before them—is completely uneven. Jessica isn’t terrible, but as Mia said, Will is just so “genius” that he completely blew her off the stage. Nigel had it right: She did a really “good job,” but Will is the stand-out. At the moment, she’s dragging him down, which is the ONLY reason they might be in jeopardy tonight.

COUPLE FOUR: KOURTNI and MATT

(Foxtrot, Jean-Marc Generaux)

My favorite crazy Frenchman saved his best, and most emotional work, for Twitchington, but this number was nice, too. But that’s exactly what it was: Nice. They were easy, breezy, light on their feet, and that fall where Matt caught Kourtni by the neck just before she hit the floor was amazing. But they were totally forgettable. Mary was unhappy with their footwork, given their technical training, and Nigel thought they had to put more feeling into their facial expressions. Since they were in the bottom three last week, they might be there again—but I’d personally put them in slot No. 4, right behind Comfort and Chris.

COUPLE FIVE: COURTNEY G. and GEV

(Contemporary, Mandy Moore)

If I didn’t know Mandy Moore was the choreographer, I would have thought this was a Mia routine. Which is why I was surprised to hear her say she thought Courtney “jazzified” it a bit. I agreed with Mary: The chemistry between these two is definitely killer. They delivered a sweet, lovely routine that looked simple – but clearly wasn’t. Gev really stepped it up, proving to be an able partner, and Courtney’s expressions showed emotion without going overboard.

COUPLE SIX: KATEE and JOSHUA

(Broadway, Tyce Diorio)

If the judges’ reaction is any indication, this couple is super-safe tonight. Like I said before, I wasn’t quite as wowed by this “Godspell” routine—I felt it seemed a little frenetic towards the end—but Nigel’s right: They were entertainment at its best. Mary said Katee’s broken out of her shell a bit, which may have been helped by having the charming Joshua as a partner. And Nigel seemed shell-shocked by Joshua’s ability to transform his skills as a “pop-ah” into Broadway magic.

COUPLE SEVEN: SUSIE and MARQUIS

(Salsa, Alex Da Silva)

Because of Susie’s expertise in this area, the judges had high expectations for this routine—and they let them down. Unlike Comfort—who I think got lazy—Susie realized this early on and tried hard to nail the routine. But for whatever reason, nerves perhaps, she just couldn’t get it together. To be fair, this number was whip-fast and seemed difficult, but Susie’s legs were just heavy. And she and Marquis had no connection whatsoever. (Plus, I hate to keep harping on her wardrobe, but those black bangs kept distracting me: It looked like a sick bird did his business on her head.) They deserve to be in the bottom three tonight, but Susie seems to have a hard-core fan base already, so that could pull them through.

COUPLE EIGHT: KHERINGTON and TWITCH

(Viennese waltz, Jean-Marc G.)

In one word: Beautiful. These two were graceful, elegant and effortless, everything you’d want in such an emotional dance. (And I loathe Celine Dion, so it’s saying something that I was able to get past my hatred for her music to love, love, love this number.)

Twitchington did Jean-Marc proud, and there was a lot of pressure on this couple, considering the routine’s inspiration came from the choreographers’ disabled daughter. Mary was moved to tears, and I echo her disbelief in Twitch’s performance: Where did those lines come from?

Personally, I thought they were the best of the night, but I think Mia’s nitpicking may have put a damper on the audience’s enthusiasm. She didn’t think that Kherington needed to smile throughout the entire dance, because it wasn’t “reality.” And I liked that Nigel stepped in to say that Jean-Marc’s daughter was the inspiration, but it was supposed to be uplifting.

Mia aside, I’m thinking Twitchington is going to be going a long way in this competition.

COUPLE NINE: COMFORT and CHRIS

(Krump, Lil C.)

Sure, I thought Lil C’s choreography was lacking, but wow, did Comfort get lazy or what? This was her THING, man, the one she should have knocked out of the park. Poor Chris probably wasn’t going to get gansta no matter how hard he worked, but Comfort? The judges were right, she was expected to bring it—and she didn’t.

Was she toning it down to match Chris a bit better, considering she blew him off the stage last week? Maybe. But it wasn’t a smart move, because it obviously brought down the entire performance. They should be in danger tonight, but Comfort’s charisma may be enough to move the audience to vote.

That’s it til tomorrow, everyone. Who do you think will be going home tonight?

And more importantly, what will Shane Sparks wow us with in his first group number of the season?

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

Image details: 2006 Summer TCA Day 16 served by picapp.com
The hip-hop choreographer has been with the hit FOX competition since its debut, yet he’s been mysteriously AWOL from the show so far this season.

Never fear.  Zap2It.com confirmed that the man responsible for such favorite routines as this Season Two booty-shaker will be back this week.
Turns out that Sparks has been doing double dance duty this year: He’s also a judge on MTV’s “Randy Jackson Presents: America’s Best Dance Crew.”

I’m guessing there’s no love lost since the (in my opinion, vastly subpar) MTV show is run by Randy Jackson, who, of course, is part of “American Idol.” And “Dance” creator and judge Nigel Lythgoe is also an “Idol” producer.

Don’t cha love the entertainment world’s six degrees of separation?

Anyway, Sparks says he’s orchestrating this week’s group number to a Flo Rida tune.

Seems appropriate, since the rapper will be appearing in person on tomorrow night’s results show.

We’re sad to see you go, but since we barely got to know you and all, well … see ya!

The judges made the appropriate call in eliminating this couple—which conveniently means no partner-swapping next week—who gave one of the worst “Dance” performances Wednesday night.

But boy, did America get it wrong with one-third of the Bottom Three couples.

Jessica and Will?!? Huh?

Now, I’m not much of a Jessica fan; there’s something fake about her that sets my teeth on edge. Maybe others felt the same way and took out their frustrations when voting.
But despite my feelings for Jessica, there’s no way that her tango with Will was worse than the terrible disco routine Courtney G. did with Gev.

Even they looked surprised not to be dancing for their lives.

I will give America credit for putting Kourtni and Matt in the mix, however. I’d said that Susie and Marquis should be the last couple to put up a fight, but after looking at the clips again last night, I’ll admit that their waltz was better than I thought.

And y’all know I was not happy with K & M’s rendition of “Tainted Love,” so kudos to the viewers for making a good call.

Anyway, Kourtni, Matt, Rayven, Jamie, Jessica and Will were put in danger, so they had to dance their heads off in a solo.

And um, did anyone else think—except for an amazing Will, who really did seem to dance his heart out—that they all kind of, well, stunk?

Will danced last, but let’s discuss him first because he definitely had Solo No. 1. Unlike the others, his routine seemed effortless—and that first standing leap was incredible.

Even the judges were dismissive of the audience vote, putting him back in the contestant pool right away.

Nigel said they were disappointed with both Will and Jamie, but in the end, they opted to go with technique (Will) over personality (Jamie).

I never thought Jamie showed a whole lot of personality myself, so with two strikes against him, the judges made the right choice.

As for the girls, Rayven definitely was the weak link. Her ballet solo was quirky, but the judges didn’t think she showed enough effort by only going on demi-pointe.

(And as a side note, I’ll admit I was wrong yesterday when I said that only actual ballerinas should wear tutus. I forgot for a minute that Rayven IS a ballerina. Still, I stand by my criticism of  that stupid skirt. And she made it worse last night by not only wearing it AGAIN—hello, were the show’s stylists asleep?—but by adding those ridiculous striped tights.)

So while the judges got it right in eliminating Rayven, I didn’t understand their adoration of Kourtni at all.

She must have cast some spell on Nigel, because I didn’t see any kind of “magic” in her solo. Although I could sympathize with the fact that the girl was clearly nervous, her pirouettes were weak and her arabesque was visibly shaky.

But she lived to see another week! And c’est la vie, “Dance” fans, now we’re down to 18 finalists! Who do you think will be next to go?

But before we say sayonara, let’s take a moment to diss the Pussycat Dolls.

As my darling husband so succinctly put it, they were “spectacularly awful.”

That song was horrible, as the group was even lip syncing. Although it was appropriate for them to perform on a dance program, because they did a heck of a lot more dancing than singing. (And was lead singer Nicole S. wearing patent-leather pantyhose?)

And I can’t leave without saying something about Wade Robson’s fun opening number: The zombie dancers kidnapping Nigel was hilarious, but I could have done without his overacting.  The group would have been better served by pushing him offstage, because the constant camera cuts to his faux horror were annoying, and took away from some truly spectacular moves.

Anyway, that’s all for this week. Tune in next Wednesday when the nine remaining couples bring it—and Flo Rida performs on Thursday’s results show!

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

Like Twitchington, yay!.

But of course, 3 couples will be at the bottom based on America’s votes. And after tonight’s “dance for your life” solos, we’ll be sending one boy and one girl home.

Who will it be? Hard to tell: As the judges said, it’s too early to spot any front-runners.

But based on performance alone, I’ll name the couples that SHOULD be in the bottom 3:

• Rayven and Jamie

• Susie and Marquis

• Courtney G. and Gev.

Personally, a few dancers are growing on me already: Give me more of that southern Comfort!

And is it me, or do the girls seem WAY stronger than the guys this season?

Speaking of boys versus girls, here’s a pet peeve, which was really highlighted last night. During the opening sequence—when each dancer is introduced—all of the guys seem to be dressed relatively normal.

But the girls?!? Um, they look like they’ve been attacked by a poor man’s Patricia Field.

I mean, poor Kourtni: She was wearing one black tube sock and bloomers.

And was it Rayven who was sporting an unfortunate ragged pink tutu? I know this is a dance show and all, but come on, aside from Carrie Bradshaw and actual ballerinas, no one really wears a tutu.

Anyway, let’s review what each couple brought to the stage, shall we?

COUPLE ONE: RAYVEN and JAMIE

(Hip-hop choreographed by Napolean and Tabitha)

Nigel worried that their routine wouldn’t be memorable, and he was right. The only part I do recall is when Rayven depants-ed Jamie.

(Who couldn’t love a good depants-ing?)

But I thought guest judge Dan Karaty gave the most accurate comments, noting that they didn’t have any “funk.” He’s right in telling them that they need to find a way to blend levels of humor and intensity in a number like this one.

COUPLE TWO: SUSIE and MARQUIS

(Smooth waltz by Hunter Johnson)

Let’s start out by saying that Susie’s become the most talked-about contestant before the competition’s even kicked into high gear.

Forums are going nuts with arguments over whether Susie is “trashy” or “slutty” because of the way she dresses.

(As for me, I’m not saying her look reflects on the girl’s moral character, but image is everything—especially in this business.)

That said, the show was smart to have Susie dance something classy like the waltz. And while the judges kept hammering home the point that the waltz is more difficult and it’s not a crowd-pleaser like hip-hop, you couldn’t help but notice that the couple didn’t pull off their lift. Marquis brought Susie down like a sack of potatoes.

But even if this couple is in the bottom 3, I’m guessing Susie makes it through this week—if only because the judges want to justify the decision to put her in the Top 20 over, say, Kelli Baker.

COUPLE THREE: KOURTNI and MATT

(Jazz by Mandy Moore)

I really wanted to like this routine. I really, really did.

They danced to “Tainted Love,” for cripe’s sake! But I just didn’t.

Maybe I didn’t get Mandy Moore’s choreography.

Were they jewel thieves? Were they trying to steal that giant fake diamond from each other? Were their leather jackets chafing?

Again, I agreed with Dan: It was a so-so performance.

True, they were playing characters in this routine, but there’s a difference between characters and caricatures. They should check out Neil and Lauren’s “devil-angel” dance from last season to see how to do it right.

COUPLE FOUR: CHELSEA T. and THAYNE

(Cha-cha by Tony Meredith and Melanie)

Mary Murphy put this duo on the hot tamale train, and the other judges loved them, too. I wasn’t as wowed as they were, but I’ll agree that Chelsea definitely had some sexy butt-shakin’ going on. They were also the first couple who looked like they were having some fun.

COUPLE FIVE: CHELSIE H. and MARK

(Contemporary by Mia Michaels)

Wow, did Chelsie and Mark luck out! Getting to dance a Mia Michaels routine is like winning the SYTYCD lottery.

Contemporary is totally not my thing, but there’s no question that Mia’s incredibly talented and can put together a memorable number like no one else. (She’s also possibly certifiable, but that’s another comment for another blog entry.)

The point is, Mia’s dances are difficult, and Chelsie and Mark pulled it off. Yes, the deck was stacked in their favor, but hands-down, this was the best routine of the night.

Mark pulling faces like one of Tim Burton’s “Nightmare Before Christmas” characters—after all, it was Mia’s vision of what Burton’s wedding would be like—was genius. Those bird-like moves that Nigel mentioned were pretty great, too. And Chelsie played a sweetie-pie like a pro.

COUPLE SIX: TWITCH and KHERINGTON

(Broadway by Tyce Diorio)

Twitch’s christening of the couple as “Twitchington” would have been off-putting if the name-melding wasn’t a perfect metaphor for the partners.

Twitch and Kherington were completely in sync; they had terrific chemistry. They weren’t the night’s best performers, but they were absolutely the best couple.

That’s not to say their dancing was bad.

Their “Too Darn Hot” number was perky, fun and yes, hot. Especially when you consider that Twitch is a hip-hopper.

And Kherington? If dancing doesn’t work out as a career, she has a future in toothpaste commercials. I’ll bet audience members in the last row could see those sparkling choppers. She should insure those things.

COUPLE SEVEN: COMFORT and CHRIS

(Jive by Tony Meredith and Melanie)

Uh, Chris who? That poor guy was totally sidelined by the charismatic Comfort.

Talk about personality going a long way! For a hip-hop girl who’s never danced in heels, she did a fantastic job—but let’s be honest, the technique wasn’t there.

But who cared?

As Nigel said, she was smoldering, and as Dan said, she was larger than life.

Plus, she was cute but not cloying when she sounded amazed that she was wearing a bra and beads.

And she didn’t oversell the drama of a dislocated shoulder when the judges pointed it out.

She’s my favorite girl right now. As for Chris, he’ll have to stand out on his own down the road, but I’m guessing Comfort is going to carry him a long way.

COUPLE EIGHT: KATEE and JOSHUA

(Hip-hop by Napolean and Tabitha)

This N&T routine was better than the one they gave Rayven and Jamie—but Katee and Joshua sold it better, too.

Normally, I’ll do some eye-rolling at those “hip-hop love story gone wrong” routines, but this pair pulled me in. The shirt-swapping at the end was terrific.

And Dan correctly pointed out that they killed when dancing in unison, and that Katee really held her own on the stage.

I was prepared to hate her after her whole weepy audition monologue that nearly put her roommate in the Top 20 instead (and of course, there was super-supportive Natalie, waving cheerfully from the audience. Yuck.)

Maybe it’s because she didn’t open her mouth last night, but right now, I’m reserving judgement on Katee.

COUPLE NINE: JESSICA and WILL

(Tango by Hunter Johnson)

Mary said they were the “couple to beat.”

NO WAY, in my opinion—and in Dan Karaty’s, who I loved more with each comment last night. But they were pretty darn good.

Jessica’s leg extensions were incredible, and boy, did she and Will nail that lift.

Yes, they looked professional, but something about the performance felt like the pair was trying too hard.

And that first pull across the floor was lacking. Will should have made Jessica look light as a feather, not like he was hauling around a cow carcass.

COUPLE TEN: COURTNEY G. and GEV

(Disco by Doriana Sanchez)

I get it: Disco dancing is hard. And dancing to a classic like “Boogie Wonderland” just begs for criticism.

Still, Nigel was right: They were Disco Duck up there. Still, they managed to look like they were enjoying themselves.

But I doubt that enough viewers enjoyed them to keep them out of the bottom 3.

We’ll find out who stays and goes tonight! Don’t forget, it’s a results show, so it starts at 9.

The show will also feature performances by the Electric Boogaloos: Popin Pete and Shonnie. I’m less excited by the Pussycat Dolls appearance.

By the way, what is WITH this show and the Dolls’ lead singer, Nicole Scherzinger?

Didn’t she appear on the show last year when she was promoting her terrible solo album? I seem to recall a very strong wind machine, a short dress with shoe-booties and very oily legs…and I notice she scurried back the group in a hurry after her CD tanked.

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

As far as I know, there aren’t any siblings of ex-contestants this time around—perhaps the show was a wee bit worried about nepotism charges?

But there is a Schwimmer connection to one Top 10 guy, though he’s not a blood brother.

E!’s Kristin dos Santos ferreted out the truth—and a few more “Dance” tidbits—from newbie Jamie Bayard. He was Lacey’s swing dance partner for four years, and the couple won the U.S. championship TWICE.

Jamie’s official FOX bio mentions the prize part, but not the Lacey match-up.

Maybe we’ll hear more on that tonight when the Top 20 perform for the first time!

And hooray, Kristin also reports that the first group dance will be to a number choreographed by Wade Robson!

Since he wasn’t anywhere in the audition episodes, I was worried we wouldn’t see the Ramalama Bang Bang king back on the show this season.

Dance on, team!

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

Whoo hoo! Let’s get this dance party started, right?

Last night had some highs (Debbie Allen and Mia Michaels in a faux catfight!), lows (insanely talented popper Robert quits in the first five minutes!) and whoas (a rejected Paige lists the scary “fight club” rules of pageant behavior: “You don’t fail, but if you do…” She violated all of them; will the other pageant girls give her 10 lashes with a Miss Congeniality sash when she gets home?).

Anyway, here’s the show’s Top 20, with a bit o’ bio, courtesy of our friends at FOX. And thank goodness for that, because honestly, I barely remember half of these kids from the audition episodes.

Anything I can recall, I’ve put in italics after their bios. And hopefully I’ll be able to tell the rest apart by next week!

Girls:

Rayven Armijo (28) is a Contemporary/Ballet dancer from La Puente, CA. Armijo is a mentor to children and assists them with their educational goals and in dance. Armijo is proud that many have gone on to attend LA County High School for the Performing Arts.

Comfort Fedoke (20) is a Hip-Hop dancer raised in Lagos, Nigeria, now living in Dallas, TX. She is a graduate of Booker T. Washington Performing Arts High School. Fedoke was a featured performer for the past few years on “Dallas Dance Club 21,” the local Dallas dance television show. (Comfort and Joshua—see below—both made it through to the finals; they worked together to squeak through the Vegas ballroom round, even though it wasn’t their genre. Their tears and thankful prayers afterwards were genuine, not sappy.)

Courtney Galiano (19) is a Contemporary dancer from Commack, NY. Though she specializes in Contemporary, Galiano also loves to dance Hip-Hop. She appeared in the music video for Kat De Luna’s “Whine Up” and is a dancer for the New York Knicks.

Susie Garcia (25) is a Latin/Salsa dancer born in Miami, FL. Garcia graduated with a B.F.A. from New World School of the Arts. She is a high school teacher who previously was a dancer with the Miami Heat for six years. Garcia has performed at the Billboard Latin Music Awards and Latin Grammy Awards, and danced on Shakira’s “Oral Fixation World Tour.” (One of the best lines of last night went to Debbie Allen, who praised Susie’s dancing, but said that she’d be even more fabulous with more clothes on. Awesome! Now, Debbie, get this girl to a stylist, stat!)

Chelsie Hightower (18) is a Latin dancer born in Las Vegas, NV, and raised in Orem, UT. Hightower has worked with many world-renowned choreographers. She was a U.S. Worlds finalist in 2005 and competed on Team USA. (She’s the one with five brothers, one of whom paid for her dance lessons when the family was pressed financially.)

Jessica King (23) is a Contemporary dancer from Myrtle Beach, SC, where she was born and raised. She is currently attending Coastal Carolina University studying Fine Arts with a minor in Art History. King also teaches dance and performs in local theater.

Kourtni Lind (18) is a Jazz/Contemporary dancer from Forest Lake, MN, currently living in Sherman Oaks, CA. Lind began training in her mother’s dance studio at 3 years old and graduated high school at age 16 so she could begin her career.

Kherington Payne (18) is a Contemporary/Jazz dancer from Placentia, CA. Payne will graduate from El Dorado High School this summer. She is an avid soccer fan who has played for many years. (She’s the gal with the fabulous smile and stage presence, who Nigel said made last season’s finalist Dominic fall in love during her initial auditions. I kind of like her, but I need to get past her silly first name.)

Katee Shean (20) is a Contemporary dancer from San Jose, CA. Shean is a graduate of Pioneer High School and currently attends Chapman University in Orange, CA. She is pursuing a double major in leadership and dance and is active in many volunteer organizations. Shean trained at the Team Dance Company and Atlas School of Dance. (She nearly talked herself out of a place in the finals. The judges reconsidered putting her in the Top 20, all because they didn’t like that she might not come back to audition for the show again, if she was cut this time—which I found presumptuous on their part. Katee’s roommate, Natalie—who would have gotten her place—wins the “most gracious” award after the judges decide to keep Katee after all. I wonder what this little episode will do to Katee’s self-confidence in the main competition…)

Chelsea Traille (23) is a Jazz Funk and Contemporary dancer born in Houston, TX, currently living in Flower Mound, TX. Traille graduated with a bachelor’s degree in Business Administration/Marketing from the University of Texas, Dallas. She was a dancer with the NBA Mavericks during the 2006-2007 season.

Guys:

Joshua Allen (19) is a Hip Hop/Popping dancer from Fort Worth, TX. Allen hopes to be a professional dancer and recording artist. (I remember not being overwhelmed by his Dallas audition, but his moment with Comfort last night—see above—moved me.)

Jamie Bayar (22) is a West Coast Swing dancer from Palm Springs, CA, currently living in Norwalk, CA. Bayard graduated from the Orange County High School of the Arts. He was the U.S. Swing Dance champion in 2000 and 2002 and is a professor of Swing and Salsa at Loyola Marymount University.

Twitch Boss (25) is a Freestyle dancer from Montgomery, AL. A career highlight for Boss was performing “Thriller” with Wade Robson on “The Wade Robson Project” in 2003. (YAY! Twitch finally made it! He was No. 21 last year, getting beat out by Hok. That had to hurt. But he came back with a great attitude, and he’ll be interesting to watch.)

Marquis Cunningham (18) is a Lyrical/Contemporary dancer born in Cumberland, NC, and raised in Cape Coral, FL. Cunningham began dancing at 14 and trained at the Robin Dawn Academy. He is a graduate of Florida’s North Fort Myers High School and currently resides in New York City.

Matt Dorame (22) is a Contemporary dancer from Glendale, AZ. He studied for two years at Odyssey Dance Theatre in Salt Lake City.

Chris Jarosz (21) is a Lyrical/Contemporary dancer from Gaithersburg, MD, currently living in Dallas, TX. Jarosz grew up training at the Dawn Crafton Dance Center in Gaithersburg and then moved to Dallas in his sophomore year to train at Top Hat Dance Center. Jarosz is now a dance major at Southern Methodist University.

Thayne Jasperson (27) is a Contemporary dancer who grew up in Springville, UT. Jasperson was a featured dancer in “High School Musical,” and “High School Musical 2.” He danced five years with Odyssey Dance Theatre in Salt Lake City, but has only been dancing six years.

Mark Kanemura (24) is a Contemporary dancer born and raised in Honolulu, HI. Kanemura trained with 24-7 Dance Force in Honolulu and danced at Tokyo Disney. He also directed and choreographed performances on Norwegian Cruise Lines. (I could swear I’d never seen this boy on the show before he “danced for his life” last night, but his number to Queen’s “Bohemian Rhapsody” was incredible—and memorable.)

Gev Manoukian (21) is a Hip Hop/Break dancer originally from Kazakhstan and now living in Centerville, UT. Manoukian was a featured dancer in “High School Musical 2.” (What’s with everyone from “HSM?” Gev, Thayne, poor Kelli Baker who didn’t make the finals—a travesty, BTW.)

Will Wingfield (21) is a Contemporary dancer from Nashville, TN. Wingfield started dancing at age 9 at DC Dance Factory in Nashville, and later moved to Los Angeles to train under Debbie Allen at the Debbie Allen Dance Academy. (The judges weren’t sure about Will at his initial audition, which was sort of a dance protest against racism. They made him stick around for choreography, which the boy clearly nailed, since he went to Vegas. Since he’s a protege of Debbie Allen’s, she can’t come back as a guest judge while he’s in the competition. And that’s the only reason I hope he’s kicked off as soon as possible. Who knew Debbie Allen was so much fun, her overuse of the phrase “hot mess” aside?)

So, do you have a favorite yet? Personally, I can’t handicap this race until I see more of their fancy footwork, which kicks off with the first performance show on Wednesday.

Can’t wait to see which couples get paired up! Can’t wait to see who goes home first next Thursday!
Can’t wait to see what wild contemporary routines Mia Michaels comes up with next!

(And just as a side note: Does Mia scare anyone else? I wouldn’t say she’s an angry person, but every now and then, I see a flare of crazy in her eyes. I’m expecting her to snap one day, and slam some hapless dancer through a wall, while shouting, “Butterflies! Rainbows! I said, ronde de jamb, not pas de boure, damn you!”)

Tune in here next week, “Dance” fans, for further discussion!

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

Now, I’m no Milwaukee hater, but clearly the chilly city didn’t yield enough interesting dancers to fill two hours of air time.

So the show was forced to hop back and forth from Milwaukee to previous audition towns—and it was done so clumsily, I felt like Cat Deeley was taking Matt Lauer’s place in the Today show’s annual “Where in the World is …” travelogue.

Cat needed a map, not a voiceover, to help viewers identify where the heck they were at any given moment. I used guest judges Tabitha and Napoleon D’Umo as landmarks for Milwaukee.

But all the world’s a stage, right, so who cares where these dancers were? Much more important is how they moved—and I guess I haven’t been sipping the same love juice as Nigel, Mary and the rest of the “jidges.”

Because for the life of me, I can’t see why popper Michael Kim and hip-hopper Philip Courter (who both auditioned in previous seasons) got a ticket straight to Vegas.

Could the boys bust a move? Absolutely. But to throw around the phrase that the judges seem to like this season, they seemed a wee bit “one-dimensional.” I’d have at least sent them to choreography, despite Philip’s tears over seeing pal Yesenia Gomez smash her chances with a hurt knee. (His friend, Yesi, who made it far in the Vegas round last year, lost 50 pounds since then and said the show “changed her life.” Nigel made her promise to return next season.)

Were there stand-outs? Of course.

Roommates Katee Shean and Natalie Reid turned out to be unique, versatile contemporary dancers, which was a huge surprise after witnessing that giggly, dippy, pre-audition video where they showed off their bizarre workout routines.

Evan Kasprzak partnered with a hat in an effortless Gene Kelly-esque performance that, as Mary Murphy pointed out, seemed easy until he threw in some amazing leaps and controlled pirouettes that showed he was “damn good.”

And I must be getting better at this couch-judging thing, because the first thing I thought when I saw Cooper Zamorano was that he was a “dark-haired Travis Wall.” A moment later, Nigel agreed! Maybe it was the running shorts. The connection to my Season 2 dance crush made my heart go pitter-patter for Cooper, until Nigel mentioned that off-putting tongue thrust.

Then there was Astoria’s own Lizz Plott, who had a great smile, a laid-back attitude and an awesome talent for tap. She made Nigel plotz—the man’s been dying for a tapper to wow him for ages. She and fellow tapper Bianca Revels were praised up and down and got the golden ticket.

After a little while, so did Susie Garcia, the Miami high school teacher who proved she could indeed dance in the choreography round. The judges clearly saw more potential than I did in her initial audition, because I couldn’t get past the fact that Garcia was dressed like Christina Aguilera in her “Dirrty” phase.

Image details: Christina Aguilera at MTV European Music Awards 2002 served by picapp.com

That about sums up the memorable performances, except for the very last one of the night.

A “mystery dancer” named Danielle Chorizo shook her groove thang to “It’s Raining Men” in a black trench coat and umbrella. The routine was ridiculous, until “Danielle” revealed herself to be none other than Travis Wall in drag!!!

Image details: 2006 Summer TCA Day 16 served by picapp.com
Sigh. In 30 seconds, the show destroyed all of my Travis fantasies. Because I can’t possibly dream of mamboing into the sunset with a man who can work a pair of heels better than I can.

Ah well. I’ll have to console myself with the Vegas callbacks tonight!

Finally, we get to the good stuff—when the Top 20 dancers will be revealed. Tune in here tomorrow for another recap, “Dance” fans!

(Photos courtesy of FOX) 

But once again, I honestly don’t care one lick about the “So You Think You Can Dance” auditions.

Get me to Vegas already!

Charleston and Washington, D.C. were a positive snore, as far as I’m concerned.

Just like the other cities, this audition episode was just an excuse to highlight a handful of stand-outs, who, if they’re as talented as they seem, we’ll see again during the main event.

Sheila Kaiser of Atlanta was the first contestant of the day, and the first one in awhile to get a trademark WHOO! from Mary Murphy.

And Brandon Bryant of Miami, thank goodness you came back to audition when you were finally of age to try out. (He auditioned in Season 1 when he was 15; contestants have to be at least 18.)

This is a cliche, but it’s still true: The boy has a body of a Michaelangelo statue. Every muscle rippled during his audition, and every move showed off incredible strength. Nigel nailed it when he said Brandon’s body was “built for dancing.”

Other than that, no one else moved me. much I was even kind of blase about the tearjerker inclusion of Claire Callaway.

To recap: She injured herself during the Season 2 auditions, and Nigel gave her an automatic free pass to Vegas for Season 3. But she couldn’t take advantage because she got pregnant; giving birth to a cutie-pie daughter sidelined her dancing for awhile.

Yay, Claire nailed the choreography and got through to Vegas, yada, yada, yada. Sniff, sob, hooray.

As for the wackadoodles, the group of rejects oddly included at least one who was actually talented.

Of course, there were the standard nutcases—or attention hogs—like the appropriately-named Jason Looney, who auditioned in drag and insisted that his name was “Betty Wallis.”

The only good thing about Jason’s audition is that it brought out another side to guest judge Tyce Diorio, who joined the other judges in calling him a “disgrace,” then gave him a kooky little tsk-tsk finger wave while saying, “I gotcha numbah.”

Now, I’m kind of liking Tyce—when I hadn’t given him a moment’s thought before. I also love the fact that he’s the only judge who has no poker face at all. His open-mouthed horror at the more awful dancers is priceless.

Anyhoo, the unusual cukoo-bird of the evening turned out to be repeat auditioner Anthony Bryant, who—believe it or not—is a Julliard graduate who’s actually been turned down for the show TWICE.

And it’s not for lack of talent: As the judges pointed out, he has amazing technique.

Yet the kid had zero personality or passion, which he couldn’t change, even after the judges gave him another shot in the choreography round. From the little that was shown, he seemed to do pretty well with the routine to me—certainly better than others they’ve shown sailing through to Vegas.

But I’m thinking that the judges may have seen a little bit o’ crazy in Anthony, figuring he’d be a loose cannon if he ever made it through to the main competition. That theory was backed up by his wild mood swings after the audition: crying on Cat Deeley’s shoulder, cursing, smiling, and yelling about how he couldn’t find his shoes.

Maybe it was just careful editing on the show’s part, but Tony seemed a tad unstable to me. So good call in the end, though it might have made for some good future drama.

But “Dance” isn’t about off-stage drama, is it? As the judges keep reminding us, this is a SERIOUS dance competition. Players need to just stay at home.

Which is where I’ll be next Wednesday, stuffing my face with frozen yogurt, as the last audition episode airs.

We FINALLY get to Vegas—and the Top 20 announcement—next Thursday.

In the immortal words (sort of ) of Mary Murphy: WHOO!!

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

I’m totally captivated by the auditions for “American Idol,” but I can’t stand the ones for “Dance.” Maybe that’s because bad dancers aren’t quite as interesting as bad singers. (For some reason, bad singers are far more delusional.)

Let’s face it: As mean as it may be, making fun of the untalented is the only reason to watch these auditions. Because it’s rare when you’ll be watching an audition and say,”Wow, that kid’s might be the one to beat.”

That said, there actually was a moment like that last night in Utah.

Kelli Baker totally blew the judges away, and she had a lot to live up to. Kelli’s mom is choreographer Bonnie Story, who won an Emmy for “High School Musical.” (Kelli had a bit part in the TV movie, too.) Not a bad legacy, but talk about major pressure for an 18-year-old.

Luckily, her routine—complete with extensions that made putting a leg over one’s head look easy—made Mary Murphy momentarily speechless. Guest judge Mandy Moore said Kelli gave her “goose bumps.” She’s a sure thing for the Top 20, even without seeing the rest of the Vegas competition.

But other than Kelli, there weren’t a bunch of stand-outs last night. I was kind of ho-hum about most of them: Here’s hoping the producers are saving some of the big talent to show off in the Vegas episodes.

Even Chelsie Hightower—the blonde with five brothers, one of whom paid for her dance lessons when the family hit the financial skids—didn’t really do it for me. (Although I have to admit, the girl’s got the best set of legs I’ve seen this side of Heidi Klum.)

The two fitness friends? Yawn.

Joshua Allen, the hip-hop popper?  Eh.

And Paige Jones of Dallas? Really? You sent her to Vegas?

Granted, the show didn’t show more than a moment of her in the choreography round, but the perky pageant hopeful seemed better suited for an audition for “Bring It On.” I expected her to start a cheer in the middle of her routine. (“Gimme a D! A! N! C! E!)

Even Mary Murphy seemed subdued. I don’t think she uttered a single WHOOO! all night.

Anyway, the show moves on to Washington, D.C., and Charleston tonight. But I’m itching to get to Vegas already! Let’s just announce the Top 20 and get this competition started!

I want a wacky Mia Michaels routine!

I want to hear crazy Frenchman Jean Marc Genereux try to explain choreography in broken English.

I want Adam Shankman to go off on a finalist: He barely said a word last night, and he couldn’t shut his trap last season.

But what I DON’T want to see?

The Snuggle bear busting a move on my big screen when I’m trying to watch the dancers.

Seriously, the Snuggle bear? Cheee-ZEE.

(Photos courtesy of FOX)

YIPPEE!!!

Yup, the fourth season of “So You Think You Can Dance” kicked off last night, and there were just way too many things to love about its return.

There were glimpses of my favorite dancers from past seasons: Last year’s finalist Dominic and Season 2’s runner-up (and my dance crush) Travis helped out with choreography at the auditions.

The judges were their usual harsh, but occasionally slap-happy selves: Mary Murphy put one set of ballroom dancers on the hot tamale train, Nigel boogied with contortionist/popper Robert and Mia Michaels got weepy over a visually impaired contestant.

And Cat Deeley, oh how I missed your quirky fashion sense (that green trench coat was fabu!) and how you pronounce “jidges.”

It was all about the try-outs, though, and unless the show was tightly edited, I actually agree with Cat’s assessment (so far) that the show’s seeing the best dancers ever this season. Sure, there were the usual sad, deluded souls who actually do think they can dance.

But other than Sex and Captain Underpants, I can’t recall anyone truly horrifying.

Oh wait, except for the Italian Stallion. However, he creeped me—and the rest of America, I’m sure—out for many reasons other than his dance steps.

That said, here are the highlights of the good, the bad, and the bizarre:

THE GOOD

• DEVIN OSHIRO, 18, Diamond Bar, CA: The very first contestant was one of the best, though I was a bit concerned when she simply stood and said nothing when the wrong music was played. I’m sensing a bit of weirdness from this one.

• STEPHEN “TWITCH” BOSS, 25, Montgomery, AL: It was great to see this hip-hopper from last season sail through to Vegas. He almost made it into the Top 10 guys last season (he was beat out by Hok), so we’ll see if he has what it takes to make the finals this time around.

• WILLIAM WINGFIELD, 21, Nashville, TN: Personally, I’m not one for statements on this kind of a show, and I wasn’t wowed by Wingfield’s artsy nod to racism. Neither it seemed were the judges, though they gave him a chance in the choreography round, where he scored a ticket to Sin City.

• ERIKA GEE, 22, New York City: I kept getting distracted from Gee’s obvious talents by her plastered-on eye makeup, but there was no doubt she deserved a big yes. It was the third time trying out for the professional dancer, who admitted that the judges “scared the crap” out of her. Deciding to just be herself worked.

• LEONIDAS PROSKUROV, 23, and ALIONA VETRENKO, 24, Northridge, CA: The slinky Russian ballroom dancers—a couple in real life—earned the first ticket on Mary Murphy’s hot tamale train. WHOO!

• RICKY SUN, 27, Arcadia, CA, and ASUKA KONDOH, 24, Irvine, CA: The duo made it through to Vegas after a cute ballroom routine and nailing the follow-up choreography routine. All the more impressive, since Asuka was so sick she needed medical attention at the audition.

• KHERINGTON PAYNE, 18, Placentia, CA: This Jamie-Lynn Spears look-alike had great moves, a great smile, and an obvious “it” quality that the judges adored. I’m guessing she’s a sure thing for the Top 20, and I think I’d love her, too, except her unfortunately spelled first name annoys me.

• ROBERT MURAINE, 20, Los Angeles, CA: This insane popper prompted Mia Michaels to declare him “not human.” The boy is, like, quadruple jointed. He’s amazingly great at what he does, but did he deserve a straight shot to Vegas without challenging him with a few other styles? I can’t see him nailing a Viennese waltz, but I’d love to see him try.

THE BAD

• JONATHAN ANZALONE, 21, Los Angeles, CA: The supposed professional dancer from Italy was such a cheeseball, he was practically dripping with Parmesean. Perhaps “professional dancer” was code for stripper, because his routine had a definite Chippendale’s quality. He started by completely undressing in the holding room, then ripping off his shirt—and caressing his nipple, EWWW!!—during the formal audition. The only reason they gave him a shot in the choreography round was to give him a few more minutes of air time. Gross as he was, he was a producer’s dream.

• IRINA KORENKOV-ELLER, 46, Russia: This gal couldn’t dance a lick, embarrasing herself as much for her knee-high stockings paired with an ill-fitting evening gown as her awful rhythm. But how could you make fun of her? She was genuine when she said she danced from the heart, and scored points for declaring her independence from a soon-to-be-ex-husband.

THE BIZARRE

• DAVID “SEX” SOLLER, Smithtown, NY: This was the third time Sex had tried out for the show, but it wasn’t the charm. He’s one of the repeat offenders you can’t quite figure out: Is he just out for the TV exposure, or does he truly believe he has a shot? Nigel called him out for coming back when he’s beyond awful. But I’m guessing the criticism that really stung was Nigel’s refusal to no longer call him “Sex.”

• RIJIY AMES, 24, Freemont, CA: The red-haired Russian seemed honestly bewildered that the judges didn’t think dancing in one’s underpants—and tighty-whities at that—was a good choice. He learned it’s never a good idea to flash your goodies at an audition.

• GOLD INFERNO: The anonymous auditioner was back in his golden superhero mask, but it didn’t help his chances. The judges were no longer remotely kind in their rejection of the “practitioner of jumpstyle.”

Tune in next Wednesday and Thursday for another week of auditions: This time, the show’s looking for the best dancers in Salt Lake City and Dallas.

Until then, happy freestyling!

(Photos courtesy of FOX)